Horror Movies That Came Out January 2009

Here is a very limited list of what horror movies came out this month. Every tuesday I try to find the horror movies that might interest you and others in regards to the horror genre. I miss out on a few, and this is not the most comprehensive list of movies that came out, but I try my best to find and link them for you guys. The links all go to amazon.com, where you can purchase them. Once again, these help me continue to not only review relevant horror movies, but also helps you build your collection of good overall horror. At the end of every month I will recap all the movies in one easy list, in case you missed a week or two. If you'd like you can take this list and post it on your site, I don't mind. If nothing else, at least it gives you a broad idea of what horror movies came out in the month of January 2009. I missed two weeks, but in February I'll have all 4 weeks done and a monthly recap. I will also be doing a yearly recap of all the movies that came out the whole year, which will be a massive list, but it will definitely help you and me figure out what came out in horror that year. I hope to continue this throughout the months, so keep your eyes open.

Zodiac Blu Ray Dvd
Vampyres Dvd
Sharks in Venice Dvd
The Notorious Nobodies Dvd
Mercury Man Dvd
Just Buried Dvd
The Gene Generation Dvd
Demoniacs Dvd
Dead of Night Dvd
Dead & Buried Blu Ray Dvd
Dario Argento's Door Into Darkness Dvd
The Bourne Trilogy Blu Ray Dvd
Batman Blu Ray Dvd
America's Serial Killers: Portrais in Evil Dvd
42nd Street Forever Vol. 4 Dvd
Cold Prey Dvd
Boogeyman 3 Dvd
The Machinist Blu Ray Dvd
Repo! The Genetic Opera Dvd
Repo! The Genetic Opera Blu Ray Dvd
Poison Ivy 4: The Secret Society Dvd
Poison Ivy 4: The Secret Society Blu Ray Dvd
Saw V (Unrated Director's Cut) Blu Ray Dvd
Saw V Dvd
Voodoo Dollz
Vacancy 2: The First Cut

Thanks again to all of you that have read this site, commented, and shared your thoughts. I'll have more movies to review starting next week. I have family in town, so I might not get a review up until Wednesday, but I'll see what I can do.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

The Monthly Death Toll January 2009

Thank you, dear readers, for taking time out of your schedule to not only read these reviews, but to also comment on them. Some posts get more comments than I get to in a timely manner. That doesn't mean I don't get them, so please keep commenting on the reviews and giving out suggestions for me to check out. I'm always open to anything you have to say, good or bad, and I try to make sure that I'm somewhat available to communicate with you.

This January we saw the beginning of a couple of things. We saw more reviews of course, but also, I've started to give out the movies that I think are important to the site and that you might enjoy as well. These movies range from horrror to thriller, and are given in a post every tuesday. At the end of the month I'll tally them up and give you guys a quick reference to look at, in case you wanted to order something online through the links. The links on this site, help me get more dvd's and rent more movies. Thank you for your continued support. I'm saving up to get my own domain name, and then it's going to get good. Not that it's not good now. Thanks again.

Here are the movies that I reviewed this week, with easy links for you to check out.

Tales From the Crypt Review
Cache Review
Zombie Strippers Review
Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday Review
Halloween III: Season of the Witch Review
The Vampire Lovers Review
Tokyo Gore Police Review
Death Proof Review
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3: Leatherface Review
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 Review
Troll 2 Review
American Gothic Review

These are the films that I have reviewed up to this point. Including all older reviews, with links to their respective destinations.

Tales From the Crypt Review
Cache Review
Zombie Strippers Review
Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday Review
Halloween III: Season of the Witch Review
The Vampire Lovers Review
Tokyo Gore Police Review
Death Proof Review
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3: Leatherface Review
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 Review
Troll 2 Review
American Gothic Review
Chopping Mall Review
Jack Frost Review
Santa's Slay Review
Silent Night Bloody Night Review
Holiday Horror News
Return to Sleepaway Camp Review
Christmas Evil Review
The Search for Christmas Horror
Silent Night Deadly Night 2 Review
Second Look: Silent Night Deadly Night
Silver Bullet Review
Identity Review
The Last House on the Left Review
Constantine Review
Audition Review
The Fly Review
Primer Review
The Dead Zone Review
Ted Bundy Review
Rest Stop 2: Don't Look Back Review
Saw V Review
The Blair Witch Project Review
Drive Thru Review
A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge Review
Chaos (2005) Review
Saw IV Review
Joy Ride Review
Friday The 13th Part VI: Jason Lives Review
The Prestige Review
Captivity Review
Ice Spiders Review
The Dead Next Door Review
Pumpkinhead Review
Child's Play Review
Silent Night, Deadly Night Review
Monkey Shines Review
The Devils Rejects Review
Wes Craven's Shocker Review
The Changeling Review
Vacancy Review
House of 1,000 Corpses Review
The Tattooist Review
Feast (1992) Review
Death Race Review
Lost Boys: The Tribe Review
Hard Candy Review
Mirrors Review
28 Days Later
Feast
28 Weeks Later
Night of the Demons Review
Midnight Skater Review
The Howling Review
Dee Snider's Strangeland Review
Vampires: Los Muertos Review
High Tension Review
Blood: The Last Vampire Review
The Relic Review
The Wizard of Gore Review
Wrong Turn 2
Hatchet
The Ruins
Blood Car
Videodrome
Masters of Horror: We All Scream For Ice Cream
Believers
Cabin Fever
Dolls
They Call Her One Eye
Inseminoid
The House on Sorority Row
Planet Terror
Rob Zombie's Halloween
Funny Games
Friday the 13th
Sleepaway Camp
Camp Slaughter
Feed
Wrestlemaniac
Population 436
The Faculty
The Omen IV: The Awakening
Otis
Ax' Em
Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter
The Curve
Lifeforce
P2
The Machine Girl

Thanks again for your continued support. If you have any questions, suggestions or comments, please let me know.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Tales From the Crypt Review

One of my favorite comic book series has to be "Tales from the Crypt". I later found the television show on Fox television late nights, and enjoyed the show. However, as I learned more and more about the series, I realized that there was a movie based on the EC comics in 1972. The movie was a british horror film and was somewhat tame in consideration to other movies that we've been talking about on this blog. Could a 1972 film really showcase the best of the crypt keeper in movie format? I present now, for your consideration, Tales from the Crypt from 1972.

The movie is about a tourist group that stumbles upon a dark cave where a monk lives. The monk instructs them all to sit down and to listen. He then begins to tell them their futures, or what is assumed is their futures. However, these tales spin out of control, and the people begin increasingly desperate, but not before the Monk finishes every tale.

Here is a trailer for Tales from the Crypt:



The acting is quite well. I'm not a huge fan of horror movie acting, but the reactions and lines are spot on with what I would expect out of a British film. They react in such a manner that creates an overall sense of true horror, and mean spirited situational mistakes. I think that modern films should have higher degrees of good acting, but for whatever reasons it just doesn't happen.

The camera's don't cut often. The film uses the old style of film making with long shots before cuts, and bright colors reminiscent of the Hammer Horror films that were coming out around the same time.

My favorite of all the stories has to be "Wish You Were Here" which is a story that parallels the short story "The Monkey Paw" which gives the lesson of being careful what you wish for. But I definitely liked the sting of the first story, featuring a killer Santa Claus. That's right, we get a psycho Santa coming through and slashing his way to another victim, and this was eleven some odd years before one of my favorite films, Silent Night Deadly Night.

When all the stories have completed their take, the monk reveals something interesting and the worst effects occur, creating a laughable ending to an otherwise good overall horror film.



Is Tales From The Crypt Scary?: No. The movie is a good acted, overall thematic horror film, but is not overtly scary. The sequences and stories involved in this film are all cautionary tales. (Much like the Jenna Jameson Autobiography) The short stories all have moral endings, and prove to be more of a lesson giving format than a real scary plot twist. This movie should be the basis for Sunday School teachings and story telling, instead of promoted as a horror film. I'm a big fan of this type of storytelling, as a Christian, however it just doesn't seem to pack the punch that the original comics did.

I know, for 1972 this film could have been scary for audiences. I thought about that and then started to remember films of the 1970's and realized that this film is a lot more tame than it's contemporaries. movies like Blacula, Grave of the Vampire, Last House on the Left, The Reincarnation of Isabel, and so many other films were far more gruesome and bloody and dare I say scary.

If I were to argue for the reason why this film was scary, it would have to be for the reason that the film has a religious or psuedoreligious tone to it. The monk is like the final judge for these five people. He basically tells the people what is going to happen in their lives, and instead of giving them a choice, he condemns and sentences them to hell. Some might few this as a "God" like story. It is definitely a scary notion to consider that if God exists, and he judges you based on what you did on Earth, we're all doomed. That is unless you subscribe to Christianity or other religions. In regards to faith, we all take a gamble. However, I would like to consider the notion of Christian Apologetics Ravi Zecharias, in that if I'm wrong, so be it, to dust I return.That dust being nothing, but my life's ambition and goals of happiness reached through my life of Christianity. If I am right, then I gain so much. Strip away the religious connotations to this film, and you really have just another morality disguise.

These characters are not good. You do not cheer for anyone in this movie, and maybe that's the fatal flaw of this film. Tales From The Crypt would later produce some great programming, and would go on to release films like "Demon Knight" and "Bordello of Blood" but with their 1972 film, it just didn't feel the same. While I do recommend the 1972 Freddie Francis directed, 20th Century Fox distributed Tales From The Crypt Movie, I don't think it's that scary or good.



As a Bonus a little word from The Simpsons Season 3 Treehouse of Horror II from 1991:



During the Third Season of the Simpsons, another rendition of "The Monkey Paw" story occurred. My favorite part of that scenario was that Homer wished on his final wish, after Aliens invaded the Earth, for a Turkey Sandwich. If you recall, the Turkey was a little dry, and that prompted a freak out and then Homer threw away the paw. Flanders gets a hold of it, and the rest is history. Great comedy, for The Simpsons and it still holds up today. Yep.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Interesting Horror Movie Releases 1/27/09

Another Tuesday has arrived and a lot of different movies have hit the shelves. As a former video store clerk, I used to love new release Tuesday. However, at the video store we used to put stuff up on the Friday before release date, but that was just our little store. In regards to horror and science fiction releases, here are your selections. There are some good, some bad, and some not so horror. My best pick in this selection of movies that are coming out definitely has to go to Dario Argento's Door Into Darkness. I love all things Argento, even the newer poorly reviewed ones. If you're interested in buying the movies, click the links below and enjoy!

Zodiac Blu Ray Dvd
Vampyres Dvd
Sharks in Venice Dvd
The Notorious Nobodies Dvd
Mercury Man Dvd
Just Buried Dvd
The Gene Generation Dvd
Demoniacs Dvd
Dead of Night Dvd
Dead & Buried Blu Ray Dvd
Dario Argento's Door Into Darkness Dvd
The Bourne Trilogy Blu Ray Dvd
Batman Blu Ray Dvd
America's Serial Killers: Portrais in Evil Dvd
42nd Street Forever Vol. 4 Dvd

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Cache Review

I first saw the trailer for this French film when going to see “Super Size Me” upon its theatrical release. This trailer had me hooked, but I couldn’t see it until it was released on dvd later. The film is in French with English subtitles and it is one of my favorite foreign French horror/thrillers. It’s a tough one to watch and even harder to really explain, however I’m going to try. I now present for your consideration the film, “Cache”, directed by Michael Haneke.

A series of tapes are starting to land on a couples door. When they play the tape, it tells them that they have 7 days to live before they die….just kidding. The video is a long form tape of the front of their home. Nothing else, but a video recording of the front of their house in real time; no interaction, no strange happenings, just the front of their house during the day, creating an interesting premise.

The story then gets weirder and weirder, and Georges starts to investigate.

Here is a trailer for the French, Award Winning film, Cache:



The creepy tapes start coming in with weird drawings that show parts of Georges youth, and as time goes on, Georges and his wife suspect someone and when their son apparently disappears, things get out of hand.

The film looks good. It is shot in a manner that creates tension time and time again. The tension builds to a boiling point and you really are in for it towards the end of the film. Admittedly, I haven’t seen a movie this tense since I first saw 52 Pick Up or Funny Games. You expect a powder keg to go off, considering how slow moving the film is, and right when you think the answer is there, the movie throws in a love triangle plot point, and you really don’t know who to believe.

The acting, although in French, is great. The family looks to be right there with a documentary crew, not just a movie of fiction. The dialogue is firm and filled with trepidation. As you think the story is going to resolve, and the main characters reach the crux of the story, a shock and awe situation occurs that leaves you wondering what in the world you’ve just seen. It’s done in such a real time, subtle way. It is not glorified at all, and really punches you in the face with how cinematic it really is. I’m referring to the suicide scene towards the end of the film.

Why Cache is Scary: Cache has been argued by many people as being a thriller and not a horror movie at all. I can see that line of thinking, since the movie never really jumps into gore, sex, or violence on a grand scale. However, the movie steps across the lines of thriller and horror genres with the tension and acting. The insinuation of revenge, lust, and infidelity is enough to categorize this movie as a horror film, at least in my book.

The scariest notions that are found in this film revolve around the mysterious tapes. The movie spends a large portion of time with the tapes. The discovery of the tapes and the watching of the tapes, and these tapes are the most important piece to creating tension in this film. There are a lot of tactics to making a film tense, but the most subtle ones are created with the unknown and this film does that perfectly. The most tense moments are not even with the discovery of what is going on, but rather the consistency of the tapes delivery. These tapes keep coming, the mysteriousness keeps growing, and right when you think you have it all figured out, the rug is swept from under you.

I was working at a video store when this film came out on dvd, and a customer told me that the standard of horror and thriller genres in France consist of this sort of non resolute film making. Cache will make you mad because they never resolve the issue. It really takes you to an odd cliff and then leaves you there. You have to make a lot of assumptions, because the story never reveals itself on either side. There is more tension with the discovery of the tapes than the ending of the film, because there really is no end. The characters kind of let it go, and we are left with scenarios that make absolutely no sense in light of the rest of the film.

Cache is a scary film to me because there is a conformity to the lives of the people involved. I’m scared in a lot of ways of conforming to the pattern of this world. In many ways, I feel that I’m the last of a generation of people that fought against stagnant thought, and somehow in my own thoughts rebellious. It can be argued that I’m defeated because I’m a Christian, a form of conformity, but even in my beliefs I do not simply sit on my thumbs, but rather try to know culture, love people, and act on the principals that are spoken of in the Bible not just assume and act on preconceptions. I’m scared of someone taping me and showing me what I really am and what really happens in my life or my past. Whether it is judgment or not, the scariest part about this film is that there is someone watching and there is someone that knows more than they lead to believe and no matter how hard you try to ignore it, it keeps coming. It doesn’t want to kill you, it just is there. Are the tapes a metaphor for God? Did the creator of the tapes want the family to look back at their lives and make a change? I’m not sure. A lot of lines can be drawn in regards to the way the story is told in this film, but in the end, Cache, which means hidden, is a scary movie that slowly unravels into a mountain of powder keg and leaves you with the matches, lit and waiting for the explosion. However, if you’re not thinking, the explosion will never come.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Zombie Strippers Review

In a world gone mad, a former pornstar stars in this take on the zombie category. Today, ladies and gentlemen, I present for your reading and viewing pleasure, a review of the horror film entitled, "Zombie Strippers".

The plot is simple. A zombie virus has spread and has now landed on a unsuspecting strip club in the middle of anywhere, USA. While the U.S military fights off the infection and goes on missions to stop the onslaught, clearing anyone in their way, the strip club starts to showcase some bad changes as one victim is infected with a taste of flesh.

Here is a trailer for Zombie Strippers:



First and foremost, Jenna Jameson looks haggard. She does not look good at all, and it is sad to see her in this fashion. If you're not familiar with Jenna Jameson's body of work, you probably aren't going to care. However, Jenna was a major player in the upswing of contemporary pornography, and is one of the few pornographic stars to have succesfully crossed over from adult media to mainstream media. However, unlike Traci Lords, Jameson has found a way to market herself on equel levels with pornography and mainstream media attention. I won't go into a history of Jenna Jameson, but if you're interested in her background (non explicit, within reason) you can read her autobiography "How To Make Love Like A Pornstar" which is quite the interesting character study. Jameson's star power has her starring in this film, and like I said, she looks terrible.

The film begins with some good gore, but not great gore. The gore effects early on are all done with CG. The CG also mires the gun fire and bullet wounds in the film. They do not look real at all, and really move you away from the film. The budget is obviously low, but you could use blanks a lot better than this poor excuse for CG. I kid you not, the CG is terrible and I don't know why they didn't use some more realism.

The film quality is that of a higher end pornographic film. Meaning it is NOT "movie" quality at all. The editing is where this movie is somewhat better as a platform to move the story along. The film has a lot of dark points, and rightfully so, it takes place in a location with low lighting and extreme colors.

The first half of the film is going to make or break this for you. If you haven't seen it, just be aware that there are extended strip tease scenes and you are going to see a lot of flesh. Given Jameson's background, it is no wonder that the early portions alongside the second half of the film has her stripping and showing off her skeletal body for the camera. I didn't find this offensive, but I know some people will assume this is more than just a horror movie, and will not proceed to watch the rest of the film unfold.

Robert Englund is in this film. He's ok at best.

The film turns the zombie story around a little. As the zombies become more self aware they can still perform tasks, if they are women. Women zombies maintain their senses and are fully aware that they have extra strength and are able to do superhuman things. They also aim for the male anatomy in the way they attack.

The film goes into a full throttle horror comedy as there is a sequence where Jenna Jameson's character shoots projectiles out of her private regions. There are just too many comedic moments in this film to mention, and overall, they aren't that funny. They are attempts at hilarity, but it falls flat.



Is Zombie Strippers scary?: No. This film is not scary to me. However, as a horror comedy it does shine light on a couple of themes that are worth exploring. These themes may or may not be the intentions of the director or writer. You may disagree with me in my thoughts of the themes produced by the film, but this is what I thought when I was watching the movie. So consider these things while watching the film.

The theme that struck me the most was the general enthusiasm that the male customers of this strip club had. Initially they were docile and didn't really have that much applause for the women that were taking their clothes off. They had moderate attention spans and didn't really go over board. However, they went completely insane when the zombie women started to strip and show off their clothes. Maybe this is a metaphor for the current state of pornography and sex when consideration of men. It seems that the bar has been elevated to such states, that simple pornographic images don't suffice. Men these days enjoy a much harder, more hardcore and sickening form of adult media. This film unintentionally shows that with the way the male audience reacts to the changes of the strippers. As the strippers become more and more degenerate and decay further, the men become more and more enthused with the outcome.

I recently read a book entitled, Getting Off: Pornography and the End of Masculinity by Robert Jensen, and it had the same argument that this film illustrates. Maybe that is why I was thinking about this theme, rather than enjoying the horror comedy.

I recommend watching Zombie Strippers in contrast to what is coming out of Japan in terms of gore and comedy. As you may have noted from my review of Tokyo Gore Police, the envelope is being pushed by other countries, and it seems that our own country seems to be lagging behind in terms of horror and gore. Sure we have a good amount of gore at times, but the levels of gore that reach into comedic stages seems to be missing and while we are trying to make pg-13 films, these rated R and unrated horror comedies are the only ones trying to push the envelope in what is considered horror. Yes, watch Zombie Strippers, but don't expect a whole lot out of it. I always consider more than meets the eye in consideration to horror films, so I enjoyed it on a social commentary level, even if it wasn't the intentions of the film makers.





Oh and just in case you think this is the first time Jenna Jameson tried to get into a horror film, you might remember the film Evil Breed: The Legend of Samhain, which had a cool latex monster and a much better looking Jenna Jameson.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Jason Goes To Hell: The Final Friday Review

Jason Goes to Hell was one of my guilty pleasures for a long time. I was twelve years old and hitting puberty when I saw this film, and the nudity taught me a whole lot more than health class ever did. This film is the ninth edition of Friday the 13th and it wasn't half bad, and I still like it.

The story revolves around the capture and killing of Jason Voorhees. The beginning of this film includes some great gratuitous nudity, and then a swat team blows up Jason into a million pieces! This is epic! NO CG, just pure effects, and it is awesome. At the autopsy the coroner seems to be getting sick while trying to investigate the pieces, and then we get an interesting piece of the overall Jason puzzle...our coroner takes a big bite of the still beating Jason heart! This has some great gore, and some blackened blood spewing everywhere, insane!

Here is a trailer for Jason Goes To Hell:



The film has a nice sub plot, that goes something like this; Jason is back and he can only inhabit the body of a voorhees or be killed by one. So he seeks his only living relatives to get reborn and visits Crystal Lake and the surrounding city, where some of the Voorhees family still lives. We then get some major fight sequences, some sickening gore effects, and even a little ramen thrown in for good measure. Overall, this is a faster and dare I say, scarier Jason than the one we saw in previous films.

One of my favorite horror movie kills occurs in this movie. Three campers go out swimming and return to their camp site, and immediately we see boobs! WOOO! I'm all for gratuitous nudity! Then begins the sex scene, and man, this is graphic and still holds up in the all time best horror movie sex scenes. That is, until it gets interrupted with Jason slicing a woman in half and we see her insides! That's right, the body is split in half and spewing blood, which is so rad! Once again, NO CG no tricks just pure blood and latex effects, I applaud this, as it definitely adds to the gore in this film.

The pacing is great in this film. The director, Adam Marcus and the three writers did such a great job moving the camera and film along. There are some dark and shaky spots in the film where you couldn't tell what was going on, and the scare tactics weren't all that great. I am referring to the jump sequences that are in nearly all horror films.

I liked how the majority of the characters did not back down from any of the incarnations of Jason. They fight back until they are killed. I like to think that if we were in the film we'd do a little throwdown. I mean, it's not like we're in Wes Craven's Shocker, but if I were, I'd at least go for a shot to the face! Maybe a piledriver, an elbow to the face, a forearm...to the face! Come on! You would want a piece of Jason too, it would be epic!



Why Jason Goes To Hell Is Scary: The scariest moments in this film are not so much the outlandish plot of reincarnation that throws a spin into the Friday the 13th universe. The scariest part is somewhat supernatural, and if you'll stand by and listen, you might agree with me.

Demon possession is what I think the film projects as scary. Jason starts abducting bodies and then sucking them dry, at the same time using these vessels as weapons in his fight against anyone in his way. I am a Christian, and grew up with a Catholic mom. I'm not a catholic anymore, but I recall a time when my mom gave me this book to read. This book described Mexican Demon possession. Meaning that in Mexico there were missionaries that were casting out demons, and you know what? That kind of scares me. Later on in my life my mom and I became protestants, and I am still a Christian. However, my mom still held on to the idea that demonic possession occurs often and frequently. She even went to a church in Inglewood, California where the congregation specialized in casting demons out of people and she told me about a time when she went and there was one of these services going on and a manifestation occurred and the "demon" was choking people and going nuts. The first thing I thought of was, Jason Goes To Hell. I'm on the fence in regards to demon possession, but this movie could scare the hell out of people. Especially those that are of religious backgrounds, assuming you believe in possession and/or repression.

If you're not into the whole religious angle that I'm approaching this argument with. Consider that small towns only have one law enforcement agency working for them. That is scary in this film, because there is no big police force, there is only a sheriff and a few deputies. So when you try to call 911, you only get a couple of people responding, creating a scary moment in your crisis. Now, while the people are getting terrorized by Jason, imagine the law enforcement problems that are created due to the police being busy! These small towns suck at law enforcement and are not prepared for a serial killer or an unstoppable force of demonic nature!

I know, these two scary moments are a bit crazy. However, I try to think about how scary these things are in relative terms. These two things scare me. I recall a time when I was a child when I called 911 and the police took nearly an hour to show up. So I can only imagine what would happen if a serial killer was on the loose and there was no response and rightfully so! These small towns just don't have the man power.

If you're just shaking your head at my mockery of 911. Consider another movie with a crappy response to police response. One of my favorite films, Cop Land! Stallone pulls out a legitimate acting performance in this film about a small town where there is only one officer in charge...a Sheriff...played by Stallone! Great stuff! Similar themes run in Cop Land and Jason Goes To Hell, only one is serious and the other isn't.

I am not going to get out of this review without talking about the ending. The ending goes insane. In order to kill Jason, a special dagger has to pierce his heart, and the slow motion day dream camera motion really is stupid. However, even dumber is the sequence where Freddy's glove comes out of the earth and grabs the mask and laughs! This prompted film makers to get forced to make Freddy vs. Jason (which I enjoyed) years later.

Jason Goes to Hell came out in 1993, and still holds up as a fast moving horror film. I was surprised how good it flows, which I really thought was stellar. It's a 15 year old film and yet I wasn't bored at any moment. I thought that the comedy was toned down enough to make this film worthwhile. I enjoy it after all these years, and the whole demonic possession angle still scares me a little. Jason Goes To Hell is worthwhile, I recommend it. It's way better than Jason X, that's for sure.



Oh and don't forget to check out Cop Land, it's not a horror movie, but it's a great Stallone film. Yes, I said it, a great Stallone film.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Interesting Horror Movie Releases 1/20/09

This week a lot of movies got released on dvd, however, not all of them are in the same neck of the woods as far as genre is concerned. Starting this week I will be posting the latest releases that I found interesting int he horror/sci-fi genre. It is tough, and the list will not be comprehensive, but hey...I'll give it my best shot. You can click the titles to purchase the dvd's online.

My personal pick of the week, is definitely The Machinist on Blu Ray. The Machinist is creepy as hell, and Christian Bale's transformation is one of the greatest things I've seen in cinema. If you haven't heard, he loses weight in the film to skeletal proportions, the hard way. No CG he just didn't eat....it really is a head trip. I'll review the film after I get this Blu Ray Dvd version. The film is amazing and the Blu Ray treatment will probably be great. So if you're looking to pick up a movie this week, pick up The Machinist on Blu Ray it's well worth the price.

Cold Prey Dvd
Boogeyman 3 Dvd
The Machinist Blu Ray Dvd
Repo! The Genetic Opera Dvd
Repo! The Genetic Opera Blu Ray Dvd
Poison Ivy 4: The Secret Society Dvd
Poison Ivy 4: The Secret Society Blu Ray Dvd
Saw V (Unrated Director's Cut) Blu Ray Dvd
Saw V Dvd
Voodoo Dollz
Vacancy 2: The First Cut

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Halloween III: Season of the Witch Review

Halloween III: Season of the Witch is probably the biggest dark horse and black sheep in horror movie history. Seriously, no one really cites this film as being that great all. Rightfully so, this film has nothing to do with Michael Myers or Laurie Strode, and doesn't even pay homage to it. In fact, Halloween III is not even a straight forward horror movie or slasher, it is more of a supernatural science fiction film, and unfortunately, despite some great starting points fails to deliver on anything more than an bad attempt at spinning the series into "The Outer Limits" which was the original intention.

The third installment of the Halloween series revolves around to or three plot points. First we have a company that is manufacturing children's halloween masks. They have cornered the market and are going to broadcast a signal that makes the masks kill the kids. On the flip side the company has also stolen some rocks from Stonehenge.Oh and if that wasn't enough, there's a robotic murderous army controlled by the company killing anyone that might pose a threat.

Here is a trailer for Halloween III: Season of the Witch:



The acting is terrible in this film. Seriously this thing is a piece of junk. However, the initial start of the film really surprised me. The camera movements were solid, and the interior hospital scene's were creepy and right on point. The way the camera switched angles and the way the director decided to shoot the hysteria that loomed in the on goings of this film was just fantastic. I really enjoyed how this movie started. The more involved you got in this film, the worse it got.

There is a love scene in this film that just looks awkward to say the least. It really does look terrible, and I'm not sure why it was included. Not only that, the sexuality is toned down to tease levels and really only proves to be a hassle to the audience; male and female.

The gore effects are toned down, and while stranglings in this film are awesome, the majority of kills are slow and stupid. The camera shifts away from the scenes and has an object in front of the view points, making it hard to see what is going on. This is noticeable in the scene where a scientist is drilled to death by a robot, the camera lens props itself behind a table so you only see the legs and hear the sounds of the penetration. You would think this would intensify the film, but it actually hinders the tension a lot. If you're a fan or have memories of the "Spice" channel on cable, you might remember that porno companies would do the same thing. You wouldn't see any private parts or any sort of "action" and when you saw the bumping and/or grinding, you would see a vase or object directly in front of the camera lens, giving porno an R rating, which was worse than late night Showtime. Trust me, I know it all too well.

The music is horrendous. It is annoying and takes you out of the film completely. I had a hard time with the looping of the main halloween song that was suppose to initiate the mind control of children and kill off adults. It was a very sour and horrible tune, and while the intentions might have been that, this was very annoying to me and made me want to smash my television set.



Why Halloween III: Season of the Witch is Scary: The movie might be laughable in a lot of ways. However, there are two major scary themes that play throughout this whole film. If you are too bored or cynical about the movie, you might miss these two crucial scary things about this movie.

The first is Universal Mind Control. This is not something new at all, in fact you might remember the idea of mind control through television, and media quite well in film. For instance, lets take a trip to a more recent film and discuss Batman Forever. The main plot of that Batman film was that The Riddler was creating a 3-d device that would control the minds of Gothem City, and give him a super brain full of information. Not buying it? Consider Videodrome's hallucination sequences spiraling out of control for James Woods as he watched potential Snuff FIlms. Also consider movies like The Signal, A Clockwork Orange, The Stepford Wives, and dare I mention The Ring, all of which have plots surrounding mind control of some kind. You see this film is not necessarily about forcing the minds of people to react a certain way. It is casually introduced to children via the masks, and the results are terrifying as they tune in to watch the special program on Television. Now consider how much we give up in our daily lives in realms of freedom and control. Consider how much you use your cell phone, and if you have gps consider that too. We have willingly given up our freedom of privacy for communication, games, and convenience, and much like this films main plot, we too are brainwashed and controlled in a lot of ways. You can argue with me that you're not, and I can shun the idea, but it's true. The theme of "A Brave New World" by Huxley is a great literary formula that lines this theme I'm trying to cite as scary; he doesn't write that we will be abducted by Big Brother and forcefully enslaved, but rather, we will willingly give up our civil liberties. Rage Against the Machine once wrote, "You don't have to burn the books, you just remove them..." and that too holds a clear message to the storyline of Halloween III: Season of the Witch. The scary part of this film is how close it is to our society now. If you do not think that we are sheep at all, consider the Election process and how the media swerved the nation into supporting one candidate while making a villain and a mockery out of the other. Yes, the idea of mind control is scary, but not just on a cult level like in religion but on a more easily digested level of media consumption. We're all to blame.

The second thing that I wanted to mention about this film in regards to why it is a scary movie is the fact that the killings all involve Robots. The robots in this film kill people and do not think twice about doing so. This is scary to me, unlike movies that involve self aware robots, because robotics in the wrong hands can be devastating to us all! That is why it is scary that today in the U.S people are terrified about Robotic research and other countries are finding new ways to use robots. Robots will never become self aware and destroy us all, but they can be used to deliver killing sprees! Ok, I know I'm reaching hard for this one, but it's true. If we create humanlike robots, and instruct them to kill, they will, and won't "think" about it.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch is a cool trip into science fiction and has horror elements. However, the supernatural portions of this film outweigh the series quality and hinders the growth potential of what is now known as the Michael Myers saga. For 1982, this film had some great camera movements, and photography, considering the budget was a mere two million dollars. However, it really isn't that great of a film and shouldn't be called Halloween at all. I do recommend Halloween III for those collecting the series, or just so that you have seen it and can talk about it with friends or coworkers. The film stands up on its own, but it's not that great. It really tries to jump a shark with the ending, and well, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth.

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The Vampire Lovers Review

In college I took a literature class called "Genre Fiction" and the whole class was about horror related fiction and non fiction. One of the books we read was the classic "Dracula" by Bram Stoker. Alongside the introduction of the book and our discussion on vampirism, we watched several vampire movies, and the most intriguing of them was a movie from the Hammer Movie Collection entitled, The Vampire Lovers. I recently watched it again, and I now present for your reading displeasure, a review of the movie The Vampire Lovers.

The Vampire Lovers is a movie that revolves around a 19th century mansion where a beautiful young woman comes to stay with a local wealthy man and his family. Her extended stay causes a woman to become sick, and as her condition worsens, a clear vampiristic scenario emerges into being.

The team of vampire slayers create an awesome team to root for. They eventually start figuring things out and they find the coffins of the undead and they start slaying each vampire one by one with wooden spikes and the blood effects are awesome! The blood is so bright and pours slowly, and creates another awesome effect in this film.

The nudity is not traditional either. I mean, the nudity shows woman who are not enhanced at all. Their breasts and bodies are all natural, and that's a shock to my system. I'm not that old, so this woman that they are depicting as beautiful has curves, and has non enhanced breasts! What is wrong with them! I kid. I found these women beautiful, and interesting to note that women's bodies have changed over the years. Also, I noted that the age of these women were not young at all. I could tell, don't ask how, that these were experienced actresses and were not just out of college or trained from birth to look pretty, they actually tried to act! WOW!

Here is a trailer for the movie The Vampire Lovers:



The first thing I noticed about this movie was the fact that it had a lot of lavish sets. These sets are not traditional movie sets, they look like stage play sets and are meticulously designed and crafted. The cameras take full advantage of this, and have long sweeping intros and outros, creating an amazing mood and ambiance that you do not usually see in horror films. The production quality matches the sets, and you begin to feel as though that the film really was just a play recorded for PBS or something like that. I can not stress enough the quality of the sets depicting the forest, they can cause you to believe that this film is amateur or that you're watching a stage play unfold, or you will love the way it stands out from other vampire films which use real life out door scenes rather than creating them in a studio.

The movie showcases something that was not too common from films from 1970, even though the decade is definitely one of the most sexually free decades of all times, it just wasn't something you saw a lot of. That "something" is lesbianism. That's right, we are shown depictions of lesbian sex and nudity that is definitely leaning towards lesbianism and that definitely was a bit of a shocker for those that aren't too keen on seeing depictions of this kind. Obviously, if you're a horror movie fan in general, you're not going to care about this, however some more conservative types are going to hate this fact. I think it adds a good dynamic to the film.

This movie seems boring. I will not kid you, you have to go through a lot of storytelling before you get any sort of action and that action is not very gorey or good. You actually might be bored with the pacing, because while there are some shock scenes, they are tame in comparison with many American counterparts. (Hammer Studios is out of the UK, even though this film was distributed by a US company)



Why The Vampire Lovers is scary: This film is not overtly scary on the surface. However, rewind the clock and think about the year of 1970. Lesbianism and horror movies did not go hand in hand. So not only were you already dealing with one taboo, you threw in the fact that the villain was lesbian! This would scare women of course because you no longer had to look out for the creepy looking dude with the cape, or the bat that transforms into the likeness of a man, you now have to deal with a woman that bloodlets you until you are one of them! The undead!

The Dracula story (as written by Bram Stoker) did have vampire women, but they weren't lesbians. Being a lesbian isn't scary, but a lesbian vampire? Now that's a little scary, right? Right? Ok, if you're not buying that this film is scary at all, consider the fact the vampire slayers in this film aren't very competent. In fact, the underlying story is the fact that our main narrator was ready to strike down the head vampire but couldn't because the woman (vampire) was so pretty that he couldn't go through with it, as he was stricken with such a fear and at the same time had adoration for the villain. Men, we can get in trouble so easily, and that is scary. Your heart can deceive you so quickly, and if you're not convinced, then consider the amount of people that cheat on their spouses or significant others. The tendency to cheat and passion can blur your inhibitions and that is the crux of our vampire story in this film. Even though the women that become the victims are not initially lesbian, the lure of our vampire woman eventually does them in, and as seen in the Butler, this vampire can tame even a male heart with her beauty!

It's also scary to think that there was a time when medicine was not heavily available. The nobles in this film have to wait for a doctor to arrive on horseback as he is not near by. Also, the doctor is skeptical to the ailments involved by our victim, and he relies on superstition for the diagnoses and prescriptions. I find this scary, and you know what? It happens today a lot of the times, as doctors don't always have the answers to ailments and fringe science and medicine comes into play for many people. I know from personal experience that I visited a doctor that didn't know what was wrong with me, and had to bounce around until a Neurologist told me that I had suffered a mild concussion and that there was something wrong. Modern medicine isn't as bad as the medicine depicted in this film, and getting a doctor to see you is not a matter of having them travel on foot or horseback, but if it were, it'd be a seriously scary notion. One that actually stirs a little skepticism in me today, and probably forever.

I like Hammer's Horror collection and I like Peter Cushing in this film. This film is part of a trilogy of lesbian vampire tales, and this one is interesting in a lot of different ways. I highly recommend checking out The Vampire Lovers because of its different approach to the vampire movie genre. Seriously, this one is really different. I would definitely recommend it if you like stage plays and production, because the acting and camera motions really feel as though this was meant for the stage, and not a movie. There are so many scenes that just remind me of Shakespeare or something similar, that it's hard to get into this film. If you're looking for a straight forward, no nonsense horror film, you're not going to find it here, because it's a bit more serious than that. There is much more dialogue and reliance on speech than modern horror films, and you know what? I kind of like that. Hammer Horror puts together an ok film, and I liked it, probably because I enjoy the sets a lot and the costumes are kind of cool too. The Vampire Lovers isn't going to make a lot of top ten lists, and my writing is not going to probably convince many people that it's a worthwhile film to view, but consider that in 1970 lesbian vampires weren't exactly mainstream. In fact, in the year of 1970 not a whole lot of homoesexual behavior was talked about or discussed, which surprises me that this film was greenlit at the time. I don't know, maybe I'm just not used to seeing this style of vampire story come out of the early 70's, at least not yet. I'm going to explore the whole vampire lesbian angle from the 70's a little more. So expect more along those lines, later on. I have some other horror movies on tap. Mmm....TAP...I wish I had Rolling Rock on tap, for now, I'll have to settle for 12 oz bottles. Oh well.

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Tokyo Gore Police Review

A few months back I put up a trailer on this site for the movie Tokyo Gore Police. I also reviewed a film by the same company called, Machine Girl, and now I bring you a review of the infamous film Tokyo Gore Police!

The movie comes straight out of Japan and it is the most sickening, gore filled, sexualized movie I’ve ever seen. This movie is not scary, and should not be taken seriously, however it has shades of a police state that is more realistic to me than George Orwell’s epic book 1984.

Tokyo Gore Police is about a young woman who is on the privatized Tokyo police force and is in charge of hunting a mutant clan of serial killers. The movie is horrific from the get go, seriously. We open the film before the credits open up, with someone getting their head exploded off their shoulders with a hand gun. We see a close range head shot with a pistol that causes a head to explode into pieces and some of those pieces hit the camera lens, and in full view of a young woman. This is sick, but I couldn’t turn away.

*NOTE* DO NOT WATCH THE TRAILER IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO BLOOD and GORE. Thank You.

Here is a trailer for Tokyo Gore Police:



The movie then takes it a little slower through some set up. We get the back story of our heroine and how she idolized her father, and it made her want to join the police force. We also get the story of how her father died.

Then we get some very sexualized sequences involving our main character on a crowded subway wearing next to nothing. She is groped while riding the train, and grabs her molester, walks him to an alley and severs his arms, pulling out an umbrella and walking off screen as the rain is his blood. This image is an insane image and is just the tip of the iceberg as far as Gore is concerned in this film.

Another scene that might tear your guts out, is a sequence involving a half woman half alligator. Her lower half is an alligator’s head and she uses it to bite a man in half, with blood and limbs spreading everywhere. If that wasn’t bad enough, we also see a severed arm with a gun in hand, not able to be fired unless someone pulls the tendon at the end of the severed arm unleashing a bullet that you would believe is a c4 explosive rather than a bullet. This thing shatters the woman-alligator in half and we get blood like a fountain yet again. Oh, this lead in was directly after we saw a “snail woman” and a woman giving fellatio on a man, and then biting the man’s penis off and spitting it out, causing another geyser of blood straight into the woman’s face!



This movie disturbed me in a few ways. The over sexualized scene’s are really hard to watch. The way some of the severed bodies gush blood into the face of our heroine, really is a throwback to bukkake videos. Don’t search them, just realize that the way blood squirts into a woman’s face and her reaction seems orgasmic, really gives off the wrong message to those of us in the “know”, which is sad on a lot of different levels.

This movie is over the top in the gore department to punishing levels. Sure, Dead Alive, The Evil Dead, and other films have been gory with buckets of blood, but they look like Sesame Street in comparison to the amounts of gore and blood involved in this film. If you saw Kill Bill, and remember some of the arm severing scene’s, you’ll get a mild idea of what is going on with the gore effects in this film.

Is Tokyo Gore Police Scary? : No. This film is completely for a different type of audience. I’m a horror movie fan, and some of the stuff in this film is too harsh for me. But I still enjoy it on an artistic level. There is nice pacing, lighting, and sequencing. The cinematography and set ups to some of the shots are beautiful, and although I’m a little sickened by the amount of entrails and sexualized motives that are shown on screen, I still can’t fault the film for being less than what is advertised. It doesn’t scare me, it won’t scare you, but it might gross you out. This branch of horror is NOT for everyone, that’s for sure.

The film eventually finishes off with an end battle: but by then you’re so disgusted with the amounts of blood spilled, that you don’t really want to watch it again. Tokyo Gore Police is now out on dvd, and I recommend it. I don’t think it’s as good as Machine Gun Girl, but it fits into the “gore” and horror category that is missing in American horror movies right now. I don’t know why we don’t see more American films trying to push the envelope like this type of movie. It’s really a shame.

And here is a little bonus…do you recognize our leading lady?



Yep. That’s her. Audition creeped me out too.

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