The Purge Review

The premise that was brought with The Purge was incredible. The marketing and the ideas at first were insane, and showed a lot of footage of humanity being as awful as Raas Al Ghul said it was in Batman Begins. The idea of this movie is that all crime is legal for one full 12 hour period. That’s right, all is fair, including killing, stealing, and jaywalking. With that in mind, Rod Serling most likely was spinning in his grave, as this feels a lot like the twists and turns that would make The Twilight Zone a spectacular showcase of fear.

In fact, the whole marketing campaign felt like a lead in for one of the classic episodes from that show. If you recall them, they were all about how the suspension of crime would be handled. I didn't get to see it in theaters, but my sister did and she thought it was cool at first. She told me the ending sucked, but I didn't want to believe, and well, unfortunately, she was right for once. Just so you know, she's never right!

The Purge Starts Well Enough, But Falls Off A Cliff In The End

The start of this movie is classic, with an obvious twist that is coming and is revealed in the second act. It’s also there that we are introduced to a dilemma. A stranger shows up and then all hell breaks loose. Within the first and second act, death comes to an otherwise secure stronghold, as a security system salesman and his family are targeted for being nice to a homeless man.

This movie really starts to go off the rails in the third act, where the terrorizing group jumps and breaks through the secured home and starts to seriously cause havoc. You think everything has gone to hell and there is no hope, as each person is systematically picked off by the father (Ethan Hawke). The movie feels harder than any other movie I’ve seen in a long time. There are some dimwitted moments, but not before a lot of revenge happens. I’m sure gun nuts will love this, as it has self-defense written all over it.

The Purge is a good enough movie, through the first few acts. Then it starts to falter, and eventually comes to a halt with a twist ending that you see coming a mile away. I didn’t care for how it turned out, and really didn’t like the way it all gets sewn up in a way that a sequel is all but ready. It’s not a great movie, it has its faults, but I will say that this is not a soft movie. It’s hard, and it blows away the pg-13 crap that has been floating around the genre for some time.

I loved the premise, and I liked the way it began, but I can’t seem to find greatness in the ending. I didn’t like it, but I still think this is a strong horror, revenge flick. It reminds me of the Kevin Bacon movie where he gets revenge for the murder of his son. Perhaps The Purge on Blu Ray features better supplemental footage. Check that out and see if it’s worth your time.



Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Invasion of The Body Snatchers Review

The year was 1956, and before most of my constituents were born a movie was unleashed on the general public that would serve as a propaganda piece and illustration for communism, religious takeovers, and just about anything you wanted to portray as a dichotomy. Invasion of the Body Snatchers has some of the coolest posters in promotion of the film and has been remade time and time again. It’s one of the classics of horror, and it’s perhaps one that hasn’t aged very well at all. You know things are bad when you remember watching the movie in high school during History 101.

This edition of the film was directed by Don Siegel and it has some gripping moments. Kevin McCarthy and Dana Wynter do a fine job in Superscope here, but the pacing is just awful. It’s definitely not meant for our modern minds, or perhaps we’ve been replaced?

The plot is familiar to those that like horror and it is all about a community that has found that something has gone severely wrong with their loved ones. While investigate, a doctor takes note that something is in fact going on, and like a twist out of the Twilight Zone uncovers the fact that everyone is being replaced by creatures from another dimension. Pods are found and escape is futile.

The monsters are interesting on both sides of the coin here. The family members that are scared and the pod people as well. The pods are definitely a soap box of sorts, pushing the ideas and boundaries into political arenas but I like to think of this as nothing more than a science fiction classic.

Yes, it’s classic, and far from scary, but it’s an example or even a holding place for cinema of the past. We have come a long way, and despite my gripes with the pacing and the fact that it’s used as an educational tool in History/Humanities classes, it still holds up on the premise that you may never truly know that special someone in your life. Invasion of the Body Snatchers is not going to be watched over and over again in my house, and if it is, I know the aliens have taken over. Lord knows that the idiots have already taken over, but that’s another story for another time. I’m not sure what else to say, this is classic, this is a review, and this is me trying to keep the pirate ship afloat, so buy something already. Until next time, I’m going to write about kung fu on another site.



Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Black Sheep Review

Black Sheep is a movie that came out to a lot fanfare. In fact, I saw a lot of ads in horror publications small and large. I didn’t get around to watching it, until recently, which means that I’m far behind on my movie reviews. This came out in 2006, and it really is the best thing to come out of New Zealand since the last time I remember writing about a movie like this. I honestly, don’t remember.

The movie revolves around what you may think, killer sheep! That’s right, move over “Silence of the Lambs” here comes something that trumps you in a very annoying way. The movie is a classic tale of a young man that leaves his home for the big city, only to return to the farm and find out that something seriously wrong has occurred. In this time, Henry (main character) returns to a farm that he thought he would never come back. While he was gone his brother has been working on creating a Frankenstein of sorts, and it has gone all wrong.

Take the insanity of “Planet Terror” mix in sheep, and then throw a little Jaws in 3-D and you have a mix of movies and genres that completely obliterate your senses with pure terror. Black Sheep does a good job of punching you in the nuts, or ovaries, and doesn’t let go. It’s a fast moving horror film that doesn’t make sense, but most certainly combines shock value with incredibly stupid scenarios. Common sense gets completely trampled like a father getting a toy for his kid during a black Friday rush….I’m reaching here, my apologies.

All the classic foils that you would expect in horror are here, only done to a comedic level. From fart jokes, to insane zombie moments, you get everything you could want from a cheeseball horror movie and a little bit of levity to throw you off. By the time you realize that there is hope, something goes wrong yet again and you have our heroes fighting to save their dog, save the farm, and stop an onslaught of sheep.

Mary may have had a little lamb, but she didn’t expect this! I think the cheese has melted into my psyche by this point in the review. Overall Black Sheep is an insane movie, one with some slow moments, but it is ok, the frenetic pacing in the third act and the giant explosions that ensue from the same gag that “Beavis and Butthead Do America” had, is well worth your time. I liked it, it’s not my favorite, but it’s better than most foreign movies that I’ve seen in recent months. So check this out and see what the hype is about. It very well may be the best movie with Sheep in the title, that is not a porno.



Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Curse of Chucky Review

When they announced a new Chucky movie, I was definitely excited. Then I heard it got thrown into a nightmare world of movies. The ones that don’t end up getting a lot of fanfare at the theaters, and end up on dvd and streaming. I didn’t catch this on a streaming account, because I do not subscribe to the internet options. Instead, I had to wait for the real thing to arrive and I have to admit it caught me by surprise. This somewhat linear sequel jumps across a lot of the plots you’ve heard before, but lands somewhere in the lore of the world of Child’s Play. Remember, the original movie was NOT called Chucky, but rather a Christmas tale about a killer and a doll. Curse of Chucky pushes a lot of buttons, but may not be the excellent option that you remember.

In this movie you will find that a young woman and her mother are stalked by a killer doll. That doll is an updated version of our favorite friend, and I’m not a fan. The over polished look and feel was not great, but the movie does a good job in revealing why, but I won’t say more to that effect. Aside from that, the movie has our little buddy sounding a lot like Brad Dourif, because he’s in it! The movie moves forward with your traditional plot of murdering family members in a house, and you aren’t sure why.

By the third act you are revealed another backstory, and one that kind of makes sense. The buildup is tense, and right when you think this one is going to be over, it kicks off into overdrive. A woman in a wheelchair becomes our hero, and she is badass, until taking one hell of a spill, in which the doll we thought was real, isn’t real at all. Curse of Chucky plays with the emotions of longtime fans, and then drops them into a cornfield, and drives away. That may not make a lot of sense, because that’s how I feel about the movie. It tries too hard to make something new, when I already have 5 movies of remembering the characters.

Perhaps the best thing about the movie, and subsequently the worst thing about the movie is the ending that ties things together past, present, and future into a new world. One where the last movie is made insignificant, but then again, so what? Right?

Curse of Chucky is a far cry from the original Childs Play, but it’s not half bad. There are some logical moments, and a lesbian subplot that I swore needed boobs, but other than that, this isn’t half bad. I found it tense, and in the tradition of the original series, but with a new twist. I didn’t like the ending, nor did I really know where it was going, but overall, it’s a fun entry. One that I would probably see again, just not necessarily soon. Check it out, it’s kind of cool to see our little friend back in action.



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Bride of Chucky Review

I recall seeing this movie and the sequel in theaters a while ago, but I never sat down to review it, and therefore I am going to talk about it a bit. Today we will be dealing with the movie that brought back the doll of horror known as Chucky into the big screens and away from straight to dvd hell like so many others had to deal with. Bride of Chucky puts our little antihero in an interesting and sadistic realm with all the trimmings that you would expect from the classic horror franchise that started in the late 1980s. Gone are the slow moving plot points and lackluster scenarios and in comes a fast paced, black comedic horror film.

The movie looks great, and holds up quite well in the visuals department. Jennifer Tilly is quite the actress, and I couldn’t stop staring at her…..eyes. She has some assets that gets played up a lot here, and there are moments where some of you are just begging for a nip slip. But unlike the celebrity tabloids, the puppies are all covered up, even though they are bursting from her wardrobe at times. The cleavage is so much that one starts to wonder whether or not it ends up being a factor when she is playing poker in the World Series, but then again, it’s a matter of skill and not necessarily luck, right? I don’t know, I’m getting off topic.

The kills are brutal, but at times played up for comedic effect as Chucky is brought back by a former love. Chuck doesn’t like how he’s being treated so he kills his lover in a bathtub and gets her soul to get trapped in a doll and the two run amuck on a quest to find the original body of the soul so that they can get an amulet. This all moves along a road trip plot with two lovers that are the next serial murderers to gain fame for being a deadly couple.

Overall, Bride of Chucky is a guilty pleasure that is not really scary, but really does drum up some nostalgia here and there. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, and does a lot to entertain, make fun, and present the whole series as one big joke. I like it, and found the inside jokes to be awesome, and the ending, well the ending is just another classic moment in horror history.

John Dies At The End Review

There are a lot of horror movies that come out on a regular basis and no one sees them. This is one of those many releases that no one cared to see in theaters, but alas the world of dvd and streaming can be glad to have another movie to watch and review. I myself finally caught this one, and after I wrote about the release of David Wong’s other book and of course this book as well, it’s about time. Clumsy sentences and bad reviews aside, I found myself watching this one in wonder, as it is truly an original take on a not so original genre, the horror one that is. John Dies at the End is the focus of this review, although I’m a bit tired from making less than minimum wage, applying at jobs that don’t call me back, and wondering where my life started to tailspin in terms of getting ahead in a career path. Heck, I have no career, who am I fooling?

The film is a complex and winding tale about a couple of friends that have found a drug that makes things come to life in a way that Hunter S. Thompson would be proud of. The whole movie weaves around a guy telling a reporter about what has happened to him in the past, and how he came in contact with this insane drug known simply as soy sauce. It is killing off anyone that comes in contact with it, but not before extreme hallucinations and other off setting problems happen.

Throughout the film gags of all types happen and you get to see a great deal of gore as well. In an effort to hasten the pace, you get a lot of intertwining elements, none of which seem to make sense and the whole pay off does a poor job with revealing what the hell is going on. I had more questions about the plot and where it was going than I usually do, and by the time things started to make a little sense, a giant eyeball was eating people. John Dies at The End is definitely a movie worth watching, however, it is not worth asking any questions because you will receive no major answers.

When it comes to finding original horror movies, this is definitely a good one, so make sure that you venture out and watch it, then try to figure out what is going on. The ending will come out of nowhere with an epilogue that is fitting, all things considered.

Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter Review

I was supposed to be working on Chemical Burn stuff, but their ROKU app decided to quit, and I haven’t had time to look into their screeners that were sent out, so I’ll have to settle for this update, or rather you will have to settle.

There are a series of novels that are essentially rewritten historical accounts of the lives of iconic people and places. This altered history happens to throw the 16th president into the role of a vampire hunter and while most people may not be so quick to say the premise works, the movie does a good job of making the basis for the novel, quite compelling to say the least. With that in mind, the following review is of Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

The movie does a good job setting up the hero with the death of his mother at the hands of a vampire, than subsequently goes through some years of his training at the hands of another bloodsucker and the story starts to really move into a fast paced actioner, although it has horror elements. The movie plays more like an Asian cinema Kung Fu epic, but still maintains a certain sense of creep factor here and there. The muted and goldenrod filter on the cameras is a bit annoying, but otherwise, you get a full framework of what could have been a biopic done right. Of course the sensationalized action is something that probably never was a thing for Lincoln to deal with, but then again, his favorite sport was professional wrestling, so maybe he did see some action of this nature.

Overall the film has a good sense of humor about the whole thing, while maintaining serious tones for the slaying of vampires here and there. The slow motion is somewhat distracting and the constant computer graphics and design is not my favorite. However, the producers did a good enough job to get me to forget that and start thinking about whether or not some of the fight sequences were in fact possible. I had to remind myself that these things are NOT reality and are part of a horror-action movie, so maybe they did a good job after all.

Abraham Lincoln battled zombies before, he battled slavery, and most likely enjoyed some of Hulk Hogan’s favorite matches. (Seeing as though Hogan is sooo old, eh? Eh?) I liked this outing, even if it did have some slow motion fighting, but I liked it none the less. I thought it was interesting and it kept me awake, which is something that many other movies haven’t done in a long time. I’d suggest watching it and reading the book too.

The Jaded Horror Movie Fan

Every get jaded on horror?

The same things happen a lot, the same decisions made and we’re supposed to just dig in. I am not a fanatic, I’m just one man with opinions on the genre that I grew up with it. My parents allowed me to start watching horror when I was a child and would often times leave me at home alone and to this day I find the genre to be quite interesting. There are a lot of complexities that are pointed out within the confines of this type of cinema, but there are moments when even the best horror movie doesn’t really hit home.

I’ve been struggling to find a connection with the movies that I’ve seen in recent years, and more often than not find myself falling asleep instead of paying attention. That doesn’t bode well for readers of this site that have been with me longer than my marriage lasted. I’m in a new relationship and things are going well, and with that comes a new set of responsibilities and ideas. I have been fortunate enough to be pushed a little to watch and review horror movies that I have mustered enough of an opinion to write about in recent weeks, but things are going to change yet again.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be adding more content as I have a new found love for horror movies that transcends understanding. Instead of negativity, I’ve found some positive things to denote in a lot of the movies that I have seen recently. Heck, Sinister was a slow moving opus, but you know what? It was creative and it had some good moments. With that in mind, I will be updating the site with all new content sooner than later. Just stay with me, as I move things around and get rid of the annoying background image that messes up my phone whenever I visit my own website.

3 Scary Movies That Will Keep You Guessing

When it comes to scary movies, you probably assume cheese or at jump scares. While that is a great proponent of many classics, that is not always the case when trying to find the best of the genre. When looking for the best, you will have to look a bit below the surface, and find horrific happenings in some of the more interesting of ideas. The following list will have you second guessing the genre of horror and will get you thinking about possibly watching again, for the first time. The list contains 3 scary movies that will keep you guessing until the very end.



Audition

What’s so crazy about a man that wants to meet a woman for the purpose of dating? At first glance this film is quite tame, until you start to get a closer look at what really is going on. There are several clues sewn throughout the film that will have you guessing, but not everything is fully explained. You will even get a second guess in the end, and you will be wrapped up exactly where Takashi Miike wants you to be. This film is one of the creepier movies you will find. There are moments of brutal terror that relies heavily on only the sound design, which is something you will not necessarily understand the first time you see it.



Frailty

What if God told you to kill the evil ones? Well, that premise is taken into some strange moments with this film. This is one of the gems that you will have to see to believe as there are some super natural elements, slasher, and horror themes that will definitely have you second guessing until the last moments. Is it real? Is it fake? What is really going on with this small town man and his two boys? Is it the devil? What is going on?! Frailty rocks hard and will send sheer horror up your spin.



Seven

David Fincher does something right, and it still has people guessing. Two detective have to solve a string of cases that are deeply rooted in the deadly sins of the Bible. Turn after turn the two get closer to solving the case until they figure it all out, but the villain is the one with the last laugh as he plays one hell of a trick on the police. If you were to make this a Batman film, it would beat out all incarnations of the character, because it is tightly wound and horrific all in the same.

For those that have seen all 3 of the preceding movies, you know exactly what it’s like to venture forth into movies that will keep you guessing, and for those that haven’t seen them, rent or buy these today, they will definitely be worth your time.

New Light on Scream 4

Scream 4 Poster

I changed my mind on the horror franchise.

The other night I decided to watch Scream 4 again, my previous thoughts on the movie were dry, and devoid any sort of spark. I was in a different place back then, financially better off, just starting to blossom as a grad student, and now look at me! I’m broke, beyond belief, and can’t even afford to keep the lights on in our home. Well, I take that back, they haven’t shut off our lights or other utilities, but it’s headed that way unless this site starts kicking in, so if you have a little bit of money drop me a line sirjorge at gmail dot com and help me literally keep the lights on, I wish that was a joke.

Scream 4 is one of the many movies that I wanted to see in theaters when it came out, but instead found myself sitting on a red painted curb smoking a clove cigarette. I wouldn’t say that I’m an addict, but I miss spending time smoking, it relaxed me. Why is it that such a terrible vice calmed my nerves? At least there’s other smoking options that do the same in these modern times, but that’s for another conversation. Back to the movie, I wanted to see this in person and never did. I finally rented it while I was living in Koreatown and a new relationship was blossoming after my divorce and things in the horror world seemed boring to me. That’s why my review of this film previously didn’t ring true to what I think now.

Suffice to say that I love this movie, far more than I do the original sequels. Now, don’t get me wrong, the original movie is awesome and showcased a revival for Wes Craven after making some cheese ball movies. Albeit, my favorite is still SHOCKER, even though I am alone in thinking that. I found this movie to be stellar on the second viewing and for a lot of different reasons, actually.

I Know That Actor!

That’s right, the actors on my first go around were not that recognizable, at least not the ones that were introduced for this movie. However, that’s not the case now, I definitely spotted people I knew, included TODD from that Canadian cult show about the book of pure evil, and many others. It was then that something started to click, and the popcorn started to pop. This movie is far more entertaining than I originally thought.

The overall movie is interesting on many different levels, with our main character coming back to town in order to sign and market a self-help book on how to get over traumatic events. We then get a struggling writer and now sheriff involved in trying to resurrect her career when serial slayings start to occur. That’s not before getting a lot of self aware rants and raves about the current landscape of horror. All in all the movie flows far better than the previous incarnations, and I absolutely was thrilled with the stellar moments, and even the not so hot moments where Craven decided to pull the camera away for dramatic effect.

All in all, Scream 4 is one of my favorite horror movies to come out in recent years, and that’s say a lot, because I am usually jaded about all of these things. But not today, even though I am a few months away from being homeless, with no career to speak of, I found that this movie let me stop thinking about thing for a few hours. It gets my recommendation, even though no one will agree…so I say. Drop me a line if you have thoughts on the mater, and please, donate by purchasing items through amazon or directly through paypal, I absolutely am in need right now, thank you.

A nod to European Horror

Here's another post from a guest. I've been battling sickness, writing a lot, starting a business, and just haven't had time to watch as much horror as I'd like to. I will return to a full schedule sooner than later, but until then, check this out.  

It’s a known fact that they sure know how to make movies that make the hairs on the back of your neck stand up over there on the old continent. For all the faithful horror fans out there- just the mere mention of names as Dario Argento or Guillermo del Toro, but the last decade has witnessed a lot of involvement from part of the Scandinavian, Russian and Serbian directors who’ve managed to offer some truly amazing titles that are surely to earn a permanent place in the Horror Hall of Fame. Let’s take a quick look at some of the most memorable ones.

Sauna (2008)

A very strong title born from the collaboration of Finland and the Czech Republic. The somber and depressing movie has a solid plot with a feasible background story, which is all the more painful as it deals with the horrors of war or, more precisely, the aftermath of these horrors and the way everything good in the human nature crumbles before the atrocities we are capable of committing.

Philosophy of a Knife (2008)

Written and directed by the promising Russian talent Andrey Iskanov, the movie follows the true story of the notorious Japanese Unit 731 - known for unbelievably brutal human experiments during WW2. The atrocities carried out in the infamous unit are far too horrendous to require extra video effects, which is something the Russian director was fully aware of. His movie is but a peak into the hellish nightmare that devoured thousands of men, women, children and infants.

Semum (2008)

A surprisingly original Turkish horror, despite the fact that it exploits a theme that we’ve seen one time too many. The effects are pretty decent for this kind of budget and the plot is as simple as it is effective. Allegedly the movie is based on the real-life events of Canan Karaca. Definitely worth checking out.

Let the Right One In (2008)

The movie is actually a remake of a previous one by director Tomas Alfredson. A different and quite unorthodox story about vampires, which is as eerie as it is endearing. Every minute of the film is brilliantly steeped in the characters’ emotions and the cinematographic and music are both beautiful.

Srpski Film / A Serbian Film (2010)

In case you have missed out on this one it’s time to make up for it. Serbia has single-handedly given to the world some of the best movies in the past several years and A Serbian Film is one of them. A brutally honest, disturbingly realistic visual experience - this movie is about as snuff as it’s ever going to get. As if the topics it deals with are not atrocious enough, the camera doesn’t shy away from the violence in a way that will make you sick to your stomach.

Indie Horror Films Worth Checking Out

I'm starting to feel better, but still am not at 100%, so you'll have to deal with guest postings yet again. I'll return to the helm with all new reviews for Chemical Burn Studios work. 

Indie movies are often overlooked by fans, mainly due to the fact that their limited budget and unrecognizable actors don’t make for a very appealing advertising campaign. If you don’t frequently browse through the horror fests’ lists of indie flicks, you risk missing out on some of the best, chilling, original and disturbing titles the horror genre has ever witnessed. For those of you, who’ve only stayed up-to-date with the mainstream titles released over the past few years, we offer a list of a few brilliant indie horror films that are definitely worth checking out.

Joshua (2006)

Travis Betz is an f-ing genius for single-handedly writing and directing one of the most dark, demented and truly disturbing horror flicks of the past decade. It is truly amazing what can be done with just few mediocre visual effects and an extremely strong background story and tight plot. Betz’s efforts have been rewarded with this realistically disturbing tale of human downfall into depravity and insanity.

Splinter (2008)

A very effective Sci-Fi horror flick, which is one of those movies that actually gains from not revealing too much about the cause of events, is what you find here. The effects are decent and the gore is just the right amount to contribute to the build-up of suspension and feeling of dread throughout the movie. Director Toby Wilkins has done a marvelous job with the plot as well as with the cast.

Dead Girl (2008)

A very powerful and disturbing movie, exploring serious social issues, full of horror that should shake you is presented here. This memorable stomach turning flick deals with the most depraved choices people make when nobody is watching. The director is sparing of effects, but effectively creates a dark tale that starts off slow, but quickly builds up to a climax of absolute destruction and carnage.

Triangle (2009)

This is more of a psychological type of horror, but still it is worth mentioning, as it is quite fresh with a very unexpected turn of events. Although the movie starts out as just another slasher, pretty soon it takes a turn for the worse and the viewer is introduced to something much more sinister than just another deranged killer hunting down a group of good-looking folks.

Perkins’ 14

Perkins’ 14 is an unusually stark flick, superbly directed and filmed by Craig Singer and it’s one of the best things to come out from the After Dark Horror Fest in recent years. The unique style and engaging script only add to the movie’s effective somber atmosphere, which draws the viewer into a downfall of horror, psychological pain and brutal violence.

Clive Barker's Books of Blood Review

(Buy the Book Here)

Your old pal Sir Jorge is still sick. I haven't been able to do a whole lot of writing, so you will have to enjoy another guest blogger attempt to get you interested in horror of a different kind. Enjoy.

Clive Barker is a well-known name in the world of horror and fantasy. His biography of a director and producer holds titles such as ‘Hellraiser’ and ‘Jericho’, which are trend-setters in times, when people thought that everything has been done before. Having said this, Barker’s true talent shines most in the field of literature. Known as one of the most promising writers in the horror genre and proclaimed by none other than Stephen King as the future of the said genre, all of Barker’s books prove that he will most certainly live up to these expectations.

The first volume of the Books of Blood consists of 6 stories and 3 introductions. The first story carries the title ‘The Book of Blood’ and it unfolds the tale of how the said book came to be. The narrative is original and grim with brilliant twists and the incorporation of paranormal elements. It is interesting to point out that Barker doesn’t abide by the rules imposed on authors at the beginning of their careers for a strict word count of their works and creates every story as he sees fit. The end result is compact, concise stories that are surprisingly engaging and influential.

The second story in the book is ‘The Midnight Meat Train’, which most people will recognize as the film adaptation with Vinnie Jones and Bradley Cooper, which was actually pretty decent. The author himself has expressed his desire for the movie to become the first of a trilogy, which will shed some light on the creatures that are behind all existence and demand bloody sacrifices for it.

In ‘The Yattering and Jack’ Barker offers an interesting insight into the mishaps of an inferior daemon. Even though someone might argue that comic is not a term that ought to be used when we’re reviewing a book in the horror genre, this story has an undeniable humoristic element to it. Time and again Barker manages to offer something fresh and original, proving that he definitely doesn’t fall under any categories of the said genre.

‘Pig Blood Blues’ makes the infamous scene from Hannibal pale in comparison. Barker is truly at his best in terms of ruthlessness and brutality that makes the reader squirm with disgust. Another proof that he is willing to experiment and explore different angles and approaches of the genre, playing with and pushing the limits of sane and normal.

In ‘Sex, Death and Starshine’ the plot unfolds following the pattern of…well..sex, death and starshine. Although far from frightening, the story is quite intriguing. The dead too require a healthy dosage of entertainment and apparently they know how to get it.

‘In the Hills, the Cities’ deservedly is placed at the end of the first volume of the ‘Books of Blood’ as it is truly the best work of the author of the 6 stories. Barker’s imagination has really surpassed all limits and ventured into realms of unimaginable horror and dread.

As a whole ‘Books of Blood’ has its weak and strong points. As we mentioned before, Barker is not amongst the authors to follow predetermined patterns in their style of writing or narrative and he’s definitely not the one to spare his readers any brutality. He’s exhaustive and thorough to the point where it can get physically unsettling for the person on the other side of the book. His works are a must-read for anyone who’s looking for something different than the mainstream horror formula.

Silent Hill Revelation 3D Review

(Buy silent hill here)

From time to time, your pal Sir Jorge (me) gets sick. This week I got the flu, so in that case, I had a little help from a guest blogger. This guest blogger didn’t want to be named, just wanted a shot at posting on the old blog o rific, so without further adieu, here you go.

We dare to dream of the day that Hollywood will stop trying to make movies based on game sequels, but alas that day is yet to come…For the time being we’re forced to sit through a [yet another] mediocre and downright laughable cinematic version of one of the greatest horror game franchises that were to ever grace the face of this pitiful planet. KONAMI must really be regretting selling the rights to the franchise to an American company - now that the fellow Americans hold the legal rights to the game(s) and movie(s) all bets are off.

But onto the movie, we will see... It’s hard to write a coherent review for a movie that’s all over the place, so let’s just use the same approach to do it justice. This movie has no reason to exist. Period. After the dreaded and insufferable Silent Hill from 2006 a lot of game fans were convinced the making of films based on games had hit rock bottom and nothing worse could ever live to see daylight. Apparently scriptwriters, directors and visual artists in Hollywood mistook this for a personal challenge and thus - Revelation was born. Sometimes I think virtually every movie based on a game is doomed to failure and the guys from the East Coast seem pretty keen on proving me right (note: no, putting Angelina Jolie in the lead role does NOT a movie make or save; she’s freaking hot as hell, yes, but if I wanted to watch an hour long of a hot chick flashing her curves from every angle I’d just play me some random Sasha Grey clip).

As a religious fan of the game sequel I have to shamefully admit I was timidly hopeful for the second Silent Hill movie after having experienced one of the worst disappointments of my life sitting through the first (seriously, I wasn’t that upset when I found naked pictures and ongoing correspondence of my boyfriend with his ex, leading to an ugly break-up). Further to this the fact that it would be loosely based on the third installment of the game series, which is one of the strongest and sickest in the sequence, only added to that adorable pitter-patter of my heart and the butterfly feeling in my stomach. By the time the credits appeared on the screen I was deeply pensive about whether to pull a James Holmes on the theatre (alright, this was completely inappropriate in the light of the recent events, but you get what I am trying to say) or go home and slit my wrists with broken DVD pieces.

See? I promised you a review as coherent as the movie and so far I think I’m delivering. In all seriousness, though, the movie is all over the place - like literally. There isn’t the slightest effort from part of the script-writer to put together anything even remotely decent in terms of background story (the glue that hold together all Silent Hill-related stories no matter how irrelevant or unrelated they might seem in the beginning) and the director has only assisted with throwing in here and there random images in the spirit of the game franchise. Apart from recognizing some of the series most infamous monsters there is little that the fans will be able to relate to. As if in a meek attempt to block out these flukes, several up-and-coming and one or two famous actors have been thrown in the movie, but they’re just as out of place as everything else. Almost all of the casting of ‘Game of Thrones’ is present, which goes on to prove that when the industry has decided to promote someone, they’re going to promote the living shit out of them - even if that person can’t act to save his life (which is kind of ironic since one of the actors in question does die in the movie…and in ‘Game of Thrones’ for that matter. Wonder if it was due to bad acting). Carrie Anne Moss hasn’t acted in a scene as laughable as the infamous last dialogue with Neo from the 3rd Matrix, where he tells her she can’t die, but she argues that she can and dies, until now.

Things are not looking good in the soundtrack department either, which is baffling to say the least. With a monumentally genius composer like Akira Yamaoka, who single-handedly ensured that musically Silent Hill is just as eerie and disturbing as the story and gameplay intended it to be, the music to the movie is nothing like any of the brilliant tracks we get to experience in the games.

Without spoiling the movie for those who will bravely venture into the theatre to catch a glimpse of the abomination that it is, let me just shout out a fair warning to all faithful game fans - the notorious, but beloved Pyramid Head appears in the most unimaginably grotesque (not in a good) way - one that will leave you with nightmares for weeks to come and will possibly result in several shrink appointments.

The general atmosphere of the movie is dark and somber, albeit in a way that has little to do with the sad hopelessness that the games used to make the player care. You will find it doesn’t really matter whether the characters live or die and will fail to be thrilled by their personal tragedies, which are told in a more of a soap-opera-drama style. The safest choice you could make is to take my word that the best thing about this movie is the poster and move on with your life.

My Favorite Zombie Movie

(Buy Nightmare City Here)

Nightmare City (1980) is my favorite Zombie Movie

One of the easiest prompts you can get as a writer is simply about yourself. Any subject matter that deals with what you enjoy, love, and want to share can become the greatest piece of writing because it comes from the heart, right? Well, in a series of articles that I will be posting in the coming future, starting today, I’m going to be talking about my favorite movies in the horror genre. Today, for example, I will be talking about my favorite zombie movie. That is going to an Italian-Spanish flick that came out in 1980 known as Nightmare City.

The plot of the movie is one that is definitely note worthy. A report is at an airport awaiting a famed scientist that has been linked to a nuclear accident. When a military plane shows up, the doors open with fast running zombies and chaos starts to reign at the airport. They stab, shoot, and run with reckless abandon. Meanwhile, the reporter catches all of this and tries to warn the general public but is thwarted, and instead seeks to find his wife so that they can flee to safety while the zombie apocalypse jumps off. The twist ending is definitely one of note and will probably bring about a lot of arguments as to what really happened.

The whole movie is a great piece of European cinema, and the Italian and Spanish film making style is evident throughout. You have to give it up to them for creating a frenetically paced movie without the use of shaky cam to introduce the monsters. You feel like you’re involved in a serious apocalypse, albeit with monsters that resemble something out of the old Power Rangers television program. Sure, there are some tongue and cheek moments, the whole thing plays off like a made for television Stephen King picture, but so what?

The music is great, the acting is ok, the dubbing is fantastic, and the premise most certainly can fit into modern day worlds. You will find Nightmare City to be one great piece of zombie filmmaking and even George Romero might give it a nod or two. But that doesn’t really matter, does it? This is my favorite zombie movie, and though there are a lot of great ones out there, nothing seemed to have the impact that this one had. I saw it several times in my years, but most recently I enjoyed it with Spanish subtitles, a great one to enjoy an IPA to. If you haven’t seen this in a while, make sure that you buy Nightmare City here, and see why it’s my favorite zombie movie.

Rosemary’s Baby Review

(Buy Rosemary's Baby Criterion)

A Mother’s Worst Nightmare Comes True

Love it or hate it, the slow moving era of movies still reaches to the depths of fear and comes out charging in a relevant way. Whether you’re watching something that came from the mind of Bava or Argento or you’re watching Rosemary’s Baby, you realize that not every horror movie has to have a baby that’s exploding with violence and gore all over the place. Thank you Peter Jackson, but you will have to take a backseat to t his one, as it is far more emphatic through the reveal than anything produced in the last 10 years, although, there was that one movie about the orphan that turned out to be an older woman, what’s that movie called again? Something about adoption, who cares, who knows, let’s talk about this child molester’s movie…what, he was acquitted? No?

Rosemary’s Baby is indeed a classic for a variety of reasons. It could be the naivety that is portrayed by the main character, coming up pregnant amidst what seems like a very odd backdrop. Each 20 minute interval reveals another piece of the puzzle and as the movie continues through a variety of steps, it’s leading up to something big, and you know what the twist is, but you don’t know how it’s going to be revealed. The knowing, the slow pace, deliberate lines and lots of clues lead you to believe that there is something going awry, and when all is said and done, it is truly revealed that the devil is in the details, the little hands, and the laughter, and the coven of witchcraft that has produced the birth of the devil!

The movie is drawn out, long, boring and fully realized by a true artist. You really get tense because of the way the plot thickens into a cesspool of cool. Regardless of your take on the director, you will get a chill up your spine the way things turn out. The scariest moments aren’t really gorey, they are just moments that you see how society has changed in many ways. The hysterical wife that confides in her doctor, only to get taken to her husband, who is in on it, or how everyone involved is very much part of a cult. The whole movie churns its way through several momentous plot points, none of which deliver quite like the pay off.

All in all, Rosemary’s Baby is an example of an older movie that has some scary ideas. However, when it comes full circle it’s actually a tad on the boring side. I liked the overall artistry, it’s a work of great triumph, but in the canon of scary films, this one is not going to win over modern fans. However, if you’re a mother, father, pregnant, or are going to get pregnant, this presents a whole new level of fear that is definitely as scary today as it ever was before. Roman Polanski outdoes himself with such grace here; you don’t really get the age until you start to realize this was made in the late 60s. Mia Farrow and John Cassavetes do a fine job here, and I’m surprised at how much money this made when released. It’s a long one, so strap in for a game of scrabble!

The Raven Review

(buy The Raven here)

John Cusack is Edgar Allen Poe in this dark horror thriller of mediocre proportions. It is available now on blu ray here.

When you think of John Cusack, at least when I think of him, you often times remember the guy that is always chasing that one lost love. Whether he’s in the middle of a break up or he’s trying to win the affections of a hot chick that won’t give him the time of day, Cusack is known for wearing his heart on his proverbial sleeve, and this movie in some ways is a culmination of all his previous work, only it is wrapped in the fat head of Edgar Allen Poe.

The movie is a tale of thrilling proportions, or at least it tries to be, with a gothic feel that is quite interesting. There are a lot of components to the way the actors portray the characters that makes it fit for a stage play rather than a full-length movie. In fact, I often times wondered what it would be like to see this in person live on stage, but that would mean having a lot of money because good quality stage plays cost a lot of money to see live in Los Angeles.

The Raven moves through several acts where Poe played by Cusack, has to go through a series of grizzly murders in order to find a missing person, buried alive. The whole movie rings of Poe’s stories and really does a good job with the visual representations of the writings. However, the movie starts to slow down and get really boring towards the third act. Even though there is a slowdown, it’s still has a great deal of action, suspense, and a plot twist that you may see coming a mile away but cheer for anyways.

All in all, I liked The Raven, even if I did have a few problems with the pacing and the overall story. This work of historical fiction really does make me a tad bit more interested in Poe’s work, even though I already find what I know about his writings to be fascinating. For those that haven’t read his work, you can purchase his books here. For those that are familiar with his work the visuals are going to be cool, but the movie as a whole? Well, that’s debatable. It leans towards greatness visually but lacks a certain gusto that I would want from horror movies. Your opinion will vary, I’m sure.

Top 5 Valentines Day Movies

The month in which lovers decide to enjoy their courtship and all that jazz is fast approaching. For lovers of horror movies the day can mean a nice romantic dinner followed by a movie of epic gore, followed by whatever it is you’d like to do afterwards. For this list, we’ll focus on the top 5 Valentines Day movies. It’s bittersweet for me because February 14 is my birthday, my sister’s birthday, and a day in which society says that I should be even nicer to my girlfriend, although I try to do that daily. Whatever the case is, here are 5 movies you want to check out.

#5 My Bloody Valentine 3D

A mining community gest an insane bloodbath of terror in this remake, which was not necessarily needed, but still got made by Lionsgate. I for one saw it in theaters when it came out, and was thrilled with the way they did it. The 3D is a bit overblown, but I found it to be quite alright when I saw it again at home. In theaters, I didn’t find it to be as good as I did later, and it is now my #5 pick. You can scope this one out new/used by clicking here.

#4 Let The Right One In

I love foreign horror movies, heck I love foreign movies in general. This one is the better version as it is striking and quite insane when the reveal is finally peeled away. This Swedish movie doesn’t force you to use an allen wrench to watch it, it simply presents a budding relationship between a young vampire and a boy, and well, things get bad, really bad. You’ll enjoy it on a level of romance that is sometimes left to childhood sweethearts or tarts, whatever. You can buy it new/used by clicking here.

#3 Scream

Who is killing off teenagers in a small town? The high school kids each gets taken out and when we are introduced to the killer it’s all about a lack of SEX. My girlfriend and I named our cat partially after the main character, and this was an awesome flick that still holds up today. Scream produced a ton of sequels and even the latest one had me enjoying the popcorn one more time. This is a good one; check it out on the special lover’s day. You can buy it new/used by clicking here.

#2 Bride of Chucky

You know you can’t miss this one, it’s a loving tribute to couples everywhere, and Jennifer Tilly is smoking hot as a little doll. Chucky gets a new gal pal and they seriously want to takeover. This is a classic, it’s terrible, but hey, not all horror movies are going to win Oscars, ok. You can buy it new/used by clicking here.

#1 The Bride of Frankenstein

When it comes to custom making a woman, here is an awesome example of why you should just leave it up to God. In t his sequel to the original, the Bride of Frankenstein is created, comes to life but has a mind of her own! Oh now, a woman that thinks for herself? What next women drivers? I kid, I kid, but come on; this is the number one movie for lovers, right? Right? Click here to pick it up new/used or in a box set.

What are your thoughts? Drop me a line, let me know what you think, it’d be nice to have comments on here.

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If you want to support the efforts of this site, and me (sir jorge) you can do so by buying things on amazon through the links I provide, or you could donate some money via the link in the sidebar. If you would like to see LESS ads, you can subscribe to this website via the RSS feed link on the right. I am 100% freelance, and a pro-writer, I only write and go to grad school, so this site helps me get a cup of coffee and rent horror movies. Please help if you can, otherwise, enjoy the blog.

A Piano In the House Review

When it comes to Twilight Zone, there are episodes that are scary and there are episodes that rely heavily on the human condition. They exhibit humanity in a way that is going to be quite difficult to find scary. In this 1962 episode we go through the human emotions that we most likely have to deal with on a regular basis as adults, that of lying to ourselves.

The show is quite interesting, it features a variety of different takes on the classic notion of be careful what you wish for. Once again, I had to think about a variety of different points in my life while watching this, and each of the plot’s twists and turns recycled moments where I could relate to the showcase. This cautionary tale from the show really uses a great amount of timing to deliver the final punch line of what is otherwise a practical joke on the main character.

A Piano in the House follows the story of a man that wants a player piano in his house for his wife. He gives it to her and tells her that she could never learn to play it, so he buys a player piano that automatically plays music. However, when you play songs it causes the true nature of the listener to come out and that’s where we see some greatness in psychological story telling.

Think about it in your own life, do you ever act differently amidst certain stimulus? If the answer is, no, you’re a liar. There are certain things that make us louder, truthful, and even psychotic. I know for me, drinking opens up a wealth of rambling that is not worth listening to.

This episode was ok, it wasn’t my favorite, but it definitely was worth noting for the way personal relationships can grow sour. There is a cool twist at the end, so make sure that you check this one out.

Support Scary Film Review 

If you want to support the efforts of this site, and me (sir jorge) you can do so by buying things on amazon through the links I provide, or you could donate some money via the link in the sidebar. If you would like to see LESS ads, you can subscribe to this website via the RSS feed link on the right. I am 100% freelance, and a pro-writer, I only write and go to grad school, so this site helps me get a cup of coffee and rent horror movies. Please help if you can, otherwise, enjoy the blog.

American Horror Story Season 1 Episode 3 Review

American Horror Story is one of the more addicting horror television programs that I’ve seen in a long time. Each episode keeps drawing me into a whole new world of story telling and second guessing. I thought I had this thing figured out, then a wrench is thrown into my view, and I have to think on my feet to get moving towards a resolution. The third episode brought onto the screen several different story milestones and things are just beginning, which makes this so much better to watch than your average movie.

At this point in the story we get to find out the original owners of the house of murder, as they are calling it. There was a strange doctor that was giving abortions to women in his basement and there are some interesting Frankenstein moments where he’s working what appears to be a chimaera of sorts. The visuals here are impressive, and I definitely thought hit was a strong point in the episode.

Meanwhile in the present, the marriage that has been rocked by infidelity continues to unravel when the mistress shows up and says she’s keeping the baby. Our two faced friend comes through with a much needed helping shovel to the face which was awesome. However, not all is safe as the doctor is being drugged by someone, and he think it’s the maid!

This is quite the interesting point in the series, with a murder, a helper, and someone trying to drug the man of the house. I liked the way it was going, and it was apparent that the show is building up to something. I haven’t quite made out whether everyone is dead, if only a few of them are dead, or this is all a dream.

American Horror Story season 1 episode 3 really does do a good job of mixing storytelling with horror in a quick capsule of around 40 some odd minutes. It kept me interested, which is hard to do with television programming. I’ll have another review updated sooner than later.



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