Scary Film Review’s 2012 Holiday Wishlist

Every year I post an annual wish list of sorts in hopes of spreading my holiday cheer to anyone that loves horror movies and wants to pick up something for themselves via our links. This year, I’ve made it a point to select a few items that will reflect the nature of this site as well as the 5 readers still commenting and trying to win the prize of the month.

If you purchase any of these from the links I provide, I get a few cents back. It helps me keep writing instead of flipping burgers.

Here is the Scary Film Review’s 2012 Holiday Wishlist



The Walking Dead Board Game – If you’re a fan of the comics, the television show, and just a fan of zombies in general, you have to pick up this game. Hours of fun and excitement can be had with this extreme board game that pits survivors against zombies! Can you survive? Click here to pick up this game and get it delivered in time for the new season.



Stephen King’s Dark Tower Omnibus Hardcover – The comics that were based on Stephen King’s Dark Tower novels is now available in a hardcover edition that delivers nearly 1,000 pages of the original comic series in a hardbound amazing edition. If you are a fan, click here, and pick this up. It’s simply stunning on the inside.

Movies

Aside from the above quick picks, you’ll probably want to pick up some movies right? If you’re still buying Blu Ray and not just streaming, consider my list of the best things to get horror movie fans this year. (Click through the links to purchase them)

Cabin in the Woods Blu Ray – A surprise hit for me, although the ending was a bit, well, you’ll find out.

The Walking Dead Season 2 Limited Edition Gore Head Blu Ray – This collection comes in a nasty gorey head. It’s quite possibly the best release ever put in a limited edition box set.

The Twilight Zone Complete Blu Ray Set – This is the mother of science fiction television and is wonderfully presented in a 24 disc Blu Ray set with more special features than you can throw a stick at.

That’s it. Let me know what you are getting this holiday season, and if you’re going to shop online please visit amazon.com here, and help me keep this site going instead of having to work a normal 9 to 5. Thank you.

Return To Horror High or Return of Bad Slasher Comedy

In the late 1980’s a lot of horror movies were being rushed into production because of the box office success of many of the early slasher films that were getting much publicity. Much like action movies of the era, the studios wanted to continually pump out horror style options in between major studio productions in the genre so that teens were continually fed a slew of horror. The problem was that these films were terrible, and mostly rendered little to no box office success. Then the internet came out in the 90’s and more people started their quest to watch these older movies. Such is the case for Return To Horror High.

I first saw this film as a child, and it was ok. There are a lot of inside jokes, self-aware jokes, and lots of sexual humor that I didn’t get the first time I saw it. It took me a few years before I realized that there was a lot of cliché in this film. The characters are all either parodies of 1980s high school cinema or horror cliché. Either way, the characters are forgettable, laughable, and just tired.

The movie centers around a killer that is targeting people at a small high school, where there just happens to be a movie being filmed at the same time, years before Scream ever did the same. As the production continues, the real body count mirrors the one being filmed. The story continues and while there are a few boring sequences, some gratuitous nude scenarios, and lots of blood, the film falls flat, and is kind of boring.

Die-hard fans of horror comedy as well as George Clooney junkies will appreciate this one. Even though Clooney is not a prominent part of the film, there is still an aura about it, that makes you keep watching until the end. This is a great example of how the genre can be done terribly, as it is not a great film in any sense of the word. There are so many bad points, that you’ll just want to go back to sleep. I know I did.

I do not recommend Return To Horror High unless you’re purchasing a massive collection of horror movies, or you’re an absolute fanatic about George Clooney. To be fair, there are a few moments where you break the fourth wall and you see how a film is made. You also get a lot of “rhetoric” and jabs at the time period. You’ll have to really pay attention to get it, because it’s mixed up in sleeze.

From A Whisper To A Scream Review

Anthology horror is not exactly my favorite of genres, but they seem to be worth checking out from time to time. It seems as though the guys from Tales From The Crypt do it best. Then again, The Twilight Zone and Tales From The Darkside seemed to impress a great deal of audience members. From A Whisper to A Scream is an interesting piece of film making, if only to see a haggard and old Vincent Price tell some tales of the macabre.

The movie has four different stories that deal with the human emotion, and it is all tied together by Vincent Price, who plays a millionaire that is talking to a reporter. The report goes on to get revenge in the end, but he tells four cautionary tales, each one with a mix of nudity, gore, and revenge. I found the stories releatively interesting, although they are quick to climax, and end up being a bit lackluster when you think about them all together.

The opening story is by far my favorite, which involves some gruesome attacks and a ghost/zombie style revenge. A local man strangles a woman in a bath tub, and then gets upset over some blue balls, and we get some insane paranoia that is worth noting. Aside from the madness that is found in this story, the other ones are relatively tame, at least in the connection to human experience. I may be wrong though, but the first story is hardcore.

I do like the children’s story of sorts towards the end. The idea that children are going to take over and kill adults is always fascinating, but not as fascinating as that Spanish film I saw where that one dude was teeing off on kids full blast, remember that? Yeah, I don’t really remember either. Actually, it was called "Who Can Kill A Child" and I reviewed it in August of last year. Vincent Price hated this film, I don't hate it that much, but if I hate him, and he hates this film? Where do I stand?

Throne of Blood Review

I thought that this film was a more straightforward horror film, just because of the name, but as it continued to display on screen, I realized that this film is nothing more than an adaptation of the Macbeth play. Throne of Blood is not necessarily a scary film, but it is a very good morality tale with lots of twists and turns, set in Feudal Japan.

The story revolves around a military battle. The battle ends up being played out often off screen with much dialogue coming through to tell of what has happened. Two warriors are trapped in a forest and amidst the density they find a woman who predicts great things for one and not so great things for the other. Meanwhile the two end up rising through separate areas, one of which is pushed to take over the Emperor, the other becoming the emperor and this film goes off the rails midway through.

The movie really is played out nicely by the actors and the screenplay, acted out with entertainment, yet with a nostalgia look that is uncanny, gripping the viewer with emotional swiftness, and making it quite intriguing to watch. There is no major gore, the black and white tone doesn’t really allow for much, but the use of fog, cold, shadow and more, really made for some spooky settings at times.

I found this film to be far better than other Shakespeare adaptations, and the dark themes really pushed the envelope to more of a scarier version than anything you might see stolen by Disney. While this is not a horror film, I found it horrific, in the way it juxtaposes emotional discord in ancient Japan with how modern thought is. If you can connect the dots of intellectual nuances, you will find this to be a thrilling piece of cinema, even if it does seem a bit slow at times. Sure it’s not horror, but man doe sit have a few moments that are so tense, you can feel it in your soul.

Top 5 Cannibal Movies

I was taking a shower yesterday and it hit me, I want to compile a list of the best top 5 cannibal movies ever made. Now, this is going to cause some controversy, especially for those that are either purists or just don’t like the genre. Here is a list that I had to fight over to consider writing and making into a list. These moves are hardcore, and not for the faint of heart.



5. Cannibal Holocaust – This Italian film is the go to film when you want to throw a cannibal viewing party. The film was made for roughly $200,000 and it has to have made the money back by now. It was released in 1980 and then came to video stores all over the world in the mid-1980’s. The insanity was banned, censored, and edited for content. The movie is still one of the more controversial films simply because of the subject matter. It’s got some sick gore, but the pacing lacks luster, which is why this is #5.



4. Jungle Holocaust – Based on a true story? Yeah, the title card says this really happened, but who knows if it really occurred? This jungle film came out in the late 1970’s and it is just as poorly paced as the other films in the genre. This Italian film featured a lot of animal violence and was censored until now. While Peta is not going to enjoy seeing wild animals trampled, severed, and killed, many purists will say it’s nothing more than anything that you’d see on the National Geographic channel. This film features lots of weird nudity, and well, cannibalism. It’s a bit better than the more famous later film.



3. Cannibal Apocalypse – Some call this Euro trash, others just call it what it is, a straight up zombie/cannibal film. I thought this film was actually one of the best options coming out of the Italian horror films. The movie features graphic brutality, and it’s not just cannibals, its police force, wild doctors, hospitals, and so much more. I love this film, and love the poster, and it’s really worth checking out. Mix zombies, cop films, and even a little military action, and you’ll see why this one is awesome.



2. Eaten Alive – While this isn’t a pure sick film, it features some amazing pieces of gore. The film features Crocodiles and Cannibals and well…is an interesting take on the gore filled shock flicks of the 1970’s. The most important thing to remember here is that Robert England stars! Before he was Freddy, he was in this low budget B cannibalistic, monster flick featuring killer crocs!



1. Ravenous – My favorite cannibal film is not something that most people have seen. This film is about a cowardly military officer that gets punished and sent to a remote campsite in the dead of winter. When a mysterious man shows up to the campsite, things start going awry, as we find out that cannibalism has taken hold of everyone, and this thing goes off the rails. It features one of the best endings, and wow, what a way to go out.

There you have it, my 5 top cannibal movies. They are hardcore, they have gore, nudity, and only now are they presented uncensored if you buy them. You'll enjoy them if you like the harder side of cinema. These aren't movies to watch with your children or parents, so make sure that you set aside a few hours for just these things.

Retroactive Review

This post has been bought/sold for an upcoming Time Travel book, sorry folks.

The Rat Man

Ah yes, Eurotrash cinema! One of my delights, and today we talk about an out of print work of genius called Rat Man. The film is dark, not in story but in visuals, devoid of anything now known as high definition. This one is going to be hard for most to find and see, but for those willing to venture out of their way to see exploitation film, this will be another instant classic.

Finding this film would have been impossible before, but since moving back to Los Angeles I've managed to find a much better selection of movies they meet the criteria of this blog. This particular film I found at cinefile, as it is the type of film that is not going to be seen by anyone that doesn't want to see it "all".

Much like other monster movies this film follows the work of a mad scientist. He spliced the sperm of a rat into a monkey to create our unholy beast. Fans of Weng Weng will probably think that the rat man is in fact him, but all signs point to someone else.

As the film goes through the simple story of a photographer in location taking pics of women, to subplots involving our man of science and a killing spree the viewer is treated like an idiot, throwing caution to the wind in order to get gag reflexes going with gratuitous gore.

The film seems dubbed, and the acting is sub par. You really feel like you're watching made for cable horror as the shots, acting, and low light make for something straight out of The Hitchhiker or early HBO studio films. Many will find this low quality style boring and crude, while horror buffs will love the constant use of the damsel in distress, mixed with laughable violence.

The actual rat man is not scary, the idea and premise lends itself well to nightmare worlds, but the execution is too clumsy to make it more than a low budget horror piece. The film is so dark that most of the time you won't even see the creature.

All that being said, Rat Man is worth checking out. It's got some sick moments, an while as a whole it fails to scare, there are points in the sound design and visuals that will stimulate the imagination to scare even the most jaded of scary movie fans. I kid you not, however, this film is very hard to find. You won't see this in Blu ray any time soon, and I had to really seek it out. Fans of Argento and Bava will appreciate the tense pieces, as the director here uses the same rubric as the other Italian masters of suspense. I liked it, you might too.



**Note

After writing this review I found several copies on dvd, rather than the VHS rip that I received as a rental. I apologize for over hyping this film as a rare gem, as you can find this one online and through random dvd stores across the nation. However, the vhs rip is the one I saw, and will testify as being awesome. Who needs dvd? VHS FTW!

The Top 5 Urban Horror Movies

One of the major categories that I appreciate in horror is blaxploitation, and while some people say that has passed us by, I say it is alive and well. I recently was given a copy of "Black Santa's Revenge" and that my friends is living proof that the Urban Horror market is alive and well.

I'm not black, but I have African American (black) friends and they love horror movies with "brothers and sisters" cast in leading roles. I for one am hoping that people do Mexploitation films because I feel like my people aren't represented well in horror,but I digress.

Here are the Scary Film Blog's top 5 Urban Horror Movies:



5. Blacula - While I haven't done a full review of this one, it's a favorite of mine none the less. This 1972 film is a shining example of taking a good horror formula and making it for an African American audience. I loved it, and I love the sequel, it's a shining example of Urban Horror in an era that would allow you to say a lot more in film, not necessarily show more. There are some lines in this vampire tale that you can't get away with today, because film makers are far more "pc" than I'd like them to be.



4. The People Under the Stairs - This 1991 film really made some great box office hysteria when it came out. I happened to remember fondly going to the movie theater and waiting in line, hearing my friends say stuff like, "I can't wait to see The People Up Under Them Stairs" as if that was the title of the movie. Sure, it's a Wes Craven film but Ving Rhames takes center stage when he has to fight flesh-eaters from beyond! Or if not beyond, under them stairs!



3. Bones - I have no idea how anyone would think that Snoop Dogg is a great actor, but he somehow made his way into a great urban horror movie with this better than expected piece of work. Bones is a 70's gangster movie trapped in a horror package and despite some terrible lines and stupid decisions by the characters in the film, there is a great deal of finesse and care taken to bring you a new scary piece of urban horror. If you haven't seen this one, watch out for Pam Grier, she's still hot.



2. Def by Temptation - I recently reviewed this one, and despite not being a great film, it has a lot of key moments that made me rethink the whole urban horror tag. Samuel L. Jackson is in it, which is one major reason to see it, but there is enough scary points to make you question your own reality. If ever there was a reason why young men should stay away from hot women, it's this one, man, I'm scared of any bar where hot chicks are hanging out. Then again, I'm scared of bars anyways, because I'm a nerd and a horror geek with a crazy imagination.



1. Tales From The Hood - The best of the genre, is not even a new film. This anthology horror film is one of my favorite horror films of all time. It features several stories that will scare you to death. Of course my favorite is the abusive father story as it is something that I had to go through in my life, well stepfather, but still, this movie packs a serious punch and it is worth checking out. If you haven't seen it, you're just missing out on a tremendous opportunity to see some great, slick Urban horror.

There you have it folks, my top 5 Urban horror films. Of course, I've seen far more blaxploitation than the average person, and while there are a lot of films that I could've shoe horned in here, I decided to go with these 5. Obviously, we can argue what is better and what is worse, but since no one really reads this site and comments enough, I'll have to take my list and run with it, until someone comes up with more movies.

NO, Ax'Em is not going to grace my lists, unless I do a "worst" horror movie list. But even Ax'Em with all the terrible things I've seen with it, isn't the worst film ever made...and NO Troll2 isn't the worst either...trust me, you don't want to see what I've seen...because I've seen the worst, worst than you can ever hope to imagine. Maybe I'll do a list later...just not now, I'm going to go and play scrabble (aka words with friends) by myself, because i have no friends.

Jason Goes To Hell Comic Books

Last night, instead of watching a movie to review, I read the three issues of Jason Goes to Hell by Topps. I wanted to share the interior with you, but I didn't want to go overboard, or the site wouldn't load, cause 3 issues of comics is quite a large upload. So here is the first few pages from the comic book adaptation of Friday the 13th: Jason Goes To Hell. I'll have a review up this weekend, sometime, but for the meantime, check out these scans, click the images to get larger views:

















If you're interested in picking up this comic book series, you can find them for cheap online below:

Jason Goes To Hell #1 - 3 Click here

Scary Film Review Holiday Wish List 2010

It's late in the game and Christmas is nearly non existent at my house due to the financial situation that I am. However, that doesn't stop me from reviewing, writing, and adding items to my amazon wish list. Looking over some of the things that I've added throughout the years, I realize that I forgot to write a post for this years horror movie fans to enjoy. So here we go, my first ever Scary Film Review Holiday Wish List, Guide, and overall piece of crap post detailing what to buy the horror fan in your life.

I am going to be picking up a few things from this list, if my mother sends me a gift card like she did last year, and if not, they'll just go back into the amazon wish list that I have going.

Horror Movie Box Sets



Friday the 13th: The Series Complete Series DVD Set - I absolutely love the Friday the 13th television series, and would stay up late night to watch it followed by a block of Tales from the Crypt and whatever Elvira was showcasing. They finally put the whole thing on dvd and it's now available in a box set of dvd's. I for one have been wanting this set for a while, but haven't got around to getting it. If you like the film series, you might like the television show, which rocks, it's just not as gorey nor as "jason" filled.



Friday The 13th: From Crystal Lake To Manhattan Ultimate DVD Collection Box Set - Another dvd box set featuring Friday the 13th? Yes. Absolutely yes, this is a great box set of the first series of films all the way through one of my personal favorites, Jason Takes Manhattan. Sure, this isn't the complete series of films, but it is enough to get you started on one of the best slasher franchises.



Hammer House of Horror Complete Set VHS - This is going to draw some criticism because I'm recommending that you buy a box set of VHS tapes. This is an amazing collection and one of my favorite gifts ever. This six set of Hammer Horror films are presented in VHS! I love this set, and if you haven't checked out the great House of Hammer, then pick up this vhs set today.



The Ultimate Hammer Collection 21 Disc Box Set Region 2 - For those that have a region free dvd player, you're going to absolutely go nuts for this ultimate box set. 21 discs, Region 2, complete Hammer history box set with booklet, 21 dvd's of horror and so much more. I absolutely love this set and if it ever comes to the states like this, I'd buy it in a heart beat. If you love Hammer Horror and must own all of them, here it is, the ultimate hammer collection set is for you.

Obviously these are just some of the horror box sets that I would want this year, but you might want something different. Whatever it is, make sure you check out amazon online for more ideas in terms of horror movie box sets.

Blu Ray Horror Recommendations



An American Werewolf in London Blu Ray - I reviewed this movie recently and think that there are some great images that should be explored in high definition. It's actually 50% off at the time of this writing so if you're going to buy blu ray get this disc for sure. I would love to hear some of the sounds and the soundtrack of this film in full surround.



John Carpenter's The Thing Blu Ray - The Thing is one of my favorite creepy isolated science fiction horror films. If you haven't seen it recently, go back and watch it again, it's worth while and holds up very well. It has nearly everything you'd want in a scary movie, and well, you get the picture.



High Tension Blu Ray - I'm in the minority here, but I absolutely love this movie. It has one of my favorite cars in a nice chase sequence, it is gorey as hell, and has one of the most intriguing self pleasure scenes that I've seen in horror movies in a long time. I hate the ending, and the premise is a joke after the reveal, but there are some sick scenes and great gore.



Maniac 30th Anniversary Blu Ray - Maniac is back in full high definition. Sure, not a lot of people will remember this one, but I think it is quite good. It's another shining example that slashers were best done 30 years ago, because most recent slashers aren't up to par.

Horror Books

Under The Dome by Stephen King - This thousand some odd page book took me a few weeks to read. It's one of the biggest books that I've read in a long time, and it has some seriously twisted and scary moments. Sure, it gets compared to the Simpsons movie, but it's far better, at least in my view. This book was recently released in paperback but I invested in the preorder hardcover, then sold it...cause I'm an idiot.

Hell House by Richard Matheson - The mother of all Haunted House books, at least in my view. I would recommend this book above most other haunting books and it's surprising that there hasn't been a good adaptation of this book done for film, this one is a great scary read, and I loved every chapter. Although the ending is a bit weak, the build up is awesome and the "know it alls" get theirs in the end or the beginning...whatever. I saw the vhs tape a while back to the adaptation, and it's not nearly as good as the book, and that's just standard when you think of films adapted from books.

Action Figure



Elvira Coffin Action Figure - Oh my goodness, Elvira is one of my favorite horror icons. She was the woman that I wanted to be with when I was a kid and a teenager, and when I started to ask chicks out, I had to ask any girl out that looked anything like Elvira...leading me to get rejected by a lot of women. Well, now here is an amazing action figure, anatomically correct in a night gown, fish nets and a coffin. I love it, you might love it too.

NES 8 Bit Games



Total Recall NES - Many people will remember the classic science fiction film, but do you remember playing the video game? Do you even own a Nintendo system still? Well if you do, you're going to want to pick this one up too, this is Total Recall, the ultimate NES adaptation and well it's a hard game to master, but it's one of my favorite sci-fi 8 bit classics. I'm in the minority on that one.



A Nightmare on Elm Street NES - LJN might be one of the most hated game companies, but I loved playing A Nightmare on Elm Street, because it is just weird and fun. I like it, and it is not easy to master.

One Last Thing



A Nightmare on Elm Street Freddy Kruger "Freddy's Glove" Prop - This is one thing that I absolutely love. I would pick this up in a heart beat and scare the crap out of kids in the neighborhood. This replica Freddy Kruger glove is just amazing, and while it's not going to kill anyone, it's something to give a true horror fan. Forget the dvd's, get this thing, it's rad.

So there you have it folks. There goes my 2010 holiday gift list, guide, or whatever. I guess I should have posted this a while ago, but instead I posted it today...cause I'm an idiot. If you have a few extra pennies click the links provided to shop on amazon and help support this site. I'll have a review of a recent indie horror film coming Friday, and then a nice Christmas post for you guys that celebrate.

Friday The 13th Part 3 Review

Alright, the year was 1982 and the franchise known for one mean looking dude was back, and this time it was in full 3-D. That's right, 3D film isn't something that just came out in the last two years to annoy the crap out of me, it was around in the 1980's and this film was theatrically released with as much 3-D possible. The hilarious thing about this film, was that it was supposed to kill off the series and make it into a trilogy, but somehow by hook or crook, they kept making sequels, and I kept on buying popcorn and watching them.

Friday the 13th Part 3 was released in 1982, and it was a solid sequel to the franchise. The story was similar, a group of teens are out for some fun near Crystal Lake and they run into Jason, who's out for blood again. There is a few b-stories here, with a few quality gratuitous sex scenes, and quality kills, but overall, it's another predictable romp through Friday the 13th territory.

There is a bit more blood in this film than the previous movies, but the camera moves away from the more gorey parts so that you're not completely disgusted. It's interesting to see the body count stiffen as the movies go through the years, and ultimately, the gore and violence becomes cartoon like in the more recent movies. This time around, the gore is restricted to a few easy kills from long range.

It's interesting to note that there is a "token" black guy in this film, and guess what? He doesn't die first! He actually makes it pretty far, although he is taken out towards the end of the film, and he gets hacked to death, although it's off screen, so that no one gets offended.

There is nudity in this film, and it's not half bad. But it's not as extended as some of the latter films, especially that of Jason Goes To Hell, but it will be something for those that are keeping track of what predictable things happen in slasher films from the 1980's. I appreciated it, and it was a sure sign that someone was going to die.

The ending of this film is interesting as the last survivor wakes up to see Jason and out of the water comes his mother!!!! Yes, nice quality kill spot here. The movie has Jason dying, yet again, and we can only assume that he's finally dead, but those that are following the series, know that this is not the last time we see Jason Voorhees.

3D is interesting on dvd, especially since you have no 3-D glasses to make the effect work. There are a lot of shots with things flying at you, some good, some just ludicrous. There are some interesting undertones here and there about being left out, left behind, and trying to fit. But no one is really thinking about the social commentary that the film seems to display, as this is another splatterfest, and one that most likely inspired the classic Turbo Grafx and Sega Genesis games Splatterhouse.

There is an alternate ending that was cut from the film, and it can be found on some of the dvd releases of this one. The main hero gets decapitated by Jason and it's just all a dream, one bad dream, but eh...it would've sucked to have that as the ending.

Friday the 13th Part 3 is not half bad, it's not my favorite by a long shot, but it has quality acting, fun death sequences, good overall tone, and some great jokes. There is even a scene where the teens have to eat their weed because the cops. Some might remember the opening to Super Troopers in which a similar thing happens, only in this film, there's no comedic payoff. Check this one out for sure, it's not terrible, although it pales in comparison to what's to come in the series.

If you're interested in getting the original VHS edition of Friday the 13th Part 3, because you're like me, and you like that sort of thing, you can purchase the vhs here in new condition.

REWIND: The Complete Silent Night Deadly Night

I was fully ready to review a new film today, but unfortunately I had something come up. I wish it were a job, but instead it was just busy work at home, you know, washing dishes etc etc. So enjoy this piece of crap rewind, while I write up a review for Wednesday...ugh...life sucks when you have no job during the holidays...seriously.



I had spent a pretty penny in November on ebay trying to get good quality versions of Silent Night Deadly Night 3, 4, and 5. Then two weeks later, guess what happened? The studios decided to release a box set to complete the 5 set of films onto dvd. That's right, you can not get the whole set on dvd, and that really ticked me off.

However, instead of sitting around and moping, I decided to go ahead with my reviews as scheduled. But before I get into the world of Silent Night Deadly Night sequels, you might want to check out my previous commentaries on the film set. Silent Night Deadly Night on dvd and part 2, as well as a second look at the iconic series.

Silent Night Deadly Night Review
Silent Night Deadly Night 2 Review
A Real Santa Claus Killer
Second Look: Silent Night Deadly Night

Stay tuned for the next three pieces of the film series, reviewed the way they should've been seen; on vhs! That's right, on vhs, so you're in for a treat...well I'm in for a treat. You'll just be bored to death, as is the norm on this site.

Don't forget to check out Silent Night Deadly Night 3-5 on dvd now in a box set.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Cherry Falls Review

Sometimes I get surprised by film that I haven’t seen, especially when I’m at the local video store; that’s where I found this semi-gem, if that’s possible to find. Cherry Falls was coupled with another film, but I haven’t watched the other one, so I’ll review this one first, and the other one, later.

Cherry Falls never hit movie theaters, but it looks like it should. It came out around the time when Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and other films were getting my idiot friends all riled up. The first thing I noticed about this film is how cute Brittany Murphy was when she was younger, and not blonde. The film also stars some other idiots, like Jay Mohr and others, but no one is going to remember the others…at least I didn’t.

The movie’s plot revolves around a mysterious killer that is targeting teenage couples having sex. Once again, the horror clichés abound in this film. A murderer killing teenagers, and especially virgins? Surely that isn’t something that we see all the time is it? When the killer starts to target Jody Marken (Brittany Murphy) the film starts to duck and move towards what seems like an inevitable conclusion, that the killer is who you least expect, or who you do expect. I actually was fooled for a moment, then when the killer was finally revealed, I realized that this thing was just another horror film.

Despite the fact that the Sheriff suggested the teenagers all have sex, and therefore set off a “sex party” where all the teens would do it on one night, there was no nudity. At least not any that I’d write on this blog, as it was lame. I’m just stating, that the film gives you the old bait and switch.

The effects and gore are real yet again. This was before the CG era of blood effects, so there are legit blood and gore effects that are right on par with a lot of other milder horror films. This film does in fact have a body count, but the slashings are quickly edited, cameras are exchanged, which makes me think that this film was made for tv, and not necessarily for large-scale release. Despite a budget of 14 million dollars, this film has some faults, all targeted about the stupid plot twists, and lack of gore. Wait, is that even possible?

Is Cherry Falls a Scary Film? : No.

Once again, teenage horror movies lose me. I’m about a decade removed from these types of horror films, and after all these years I still don’t fully grasp their appeal. I think that the outcome convolutes the film quite a bit, and I don’t like the way that the killer gets his end.

I always seem to have a problem with the logic in some of these films. Consider that the killer was doing quite well up to the final stages, where instead of being smart, cunning, and calculated he gets desperate and in his altered state of mind gets killed by the “dumb” teenager. Yes, this is cliché, and for ¾ of the film you have to assume the killer isn’t as dumb as his demise, but nope, he is dumb.

Cherry Falls suffers from a lot of different plot points, mostly derived from lackluster logical page turns. However, that doesn’t mean that this film is all bad. There are some great moments in the film, and some creative slashings, and clever lines. In fact, the sequences leading up to the reveal of the killer are done in a fashion that I haven’t seen done in a long time. The lines delivered are both sarcastic, and true, and when the tense moments build, this thing takes off into a frenetic pace.

I recommend Cherry Falls for those that love teenage horror films, and are tired of the obvious choices. This film fits quite well with other teen screamers, and while it’s not going to make a lot of top 10 lists, it will match up with a lot of other, more prominent movies in the genre.

Holiday Horror Movie 2009 Wrap Up

Well folks, we are reaching the end of the month and that means that we're doing a quick couple of wrap up posts for not only the end of the year but also the end of the month.

First and foremost, I want to thank anyone out there that has commented on any post. Your support is very much appreciated. I also want to thank anyone that purchased anything throughout the year on amazon. I made a total of 9 dollars this year! Thanks. Maybe next year I can get a little monetary help and I can get a dot com going for only horror film.

This past month I reviewed only holiday horror films. Next year I'll be doing the same with more hits that I missed this year. If you did manage to miss something this week, here are the movies and posts you should check out from the Holiday of Horrors 2009:

Silent Night Deadly Night 4: Initiation Review
Rewind: Silent Night Deadly Night 2 Review
Silent Night Deadly Night 3 Review
The Complete Silent Night Deadly Night
The Ginger Dead Man Review
Santa Claws Review
Black Xmas Review
Black Christmas Review
Wind Chill Review
Thankskilling Review

That was it for this month. I'll make sure to come back next month with a whole new slew of horror, science fiction, and exploitation films for review. If you have any suggestions, comments, or simply want to ridicule me, go for it in the comments section. If you have money please purchase something from our amazon links.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Silent Nighty Deadly Night 3 Review

Oh yes, my first of the three sequels that followed the first two killer santa movies. This third film I had to buy on vhs, in relatively good condition. I paid a lot more than it is worth, but that's ok. The whole process of putting in a vhs into my dvd/vhs player is something that I was really happy about. So while the movie is terrible, the experience is bar none.

Silent Night Deadly Night 3 starts out really creepy. In fact, so creepy that I haven't seen such a thing in a long time. It starts with a white room, completely white and our fallen villain with his brain exposed, and she runs into a Santa Claus and asks him for some presents....it's a really creppy opening. The opening leads to a flash back of our main character "Laura" dreaming of the sequencing from the first film. Laura is tied to machines and is in a room next to our killer santa.

The Plot here is somewhat simple. A blind woman with psychic powers is the victim of Ricky, our killer santa, who has come back to life and is now stalking Laura (our blind victim). The movie takes a while to set up, but manages to get itself together in time to throw down some good gore.

My first problem with this film is the first person angles used for the slayings. There's a few in here that you have to assume are Ricky, arising from his coma to stalk prey.

The second problem that this film suffers from is pacing. The pacing is slow, and you'll notice that right away. You'll get through almost an hour of this film with nothing major happening on screen. The preliminary sets of kills are all off camera, with blood splattering towards white walls and other things of that nature. You also have to suspend belief because Ricky has half of his brain exposed with 1/2 of this jar filled with water or solution. It's really a site to see, something out of Futurama. However, you have to just keep waiting.

The third problem I have with this film is the flash backs. They continually flashback to the first film, and the cuts are hard edits. There is no flashback sequencing or warning, it simply moves to the first film and then comes back to the present without much of a warning or announcement. So if you haven't seen the first film, you're going to be lost with what's going on.

Ricky is for the most part speechless, and much like a drone of sorts. That is not necessarily bad, but it is something of a let down, especially since he was so active in the first and second films. Even the gratuitous nudity didn't really do it for me.

Overall, Silent Night Deadly Night 3 is a slow moving piece of the overall movie series. It's a tad bit boring, with little to no saving grace other than the fact that it's Holiday Themed, featuers a well established Santa Claus killer, and continues the tradition of sorts. I liked it enough to see it, and own it, but I wouldn't recommend it to a lot of people. It's just too slow, and if you thought part 2 was slow or the first one had some slow moving parts, you just don't know what slow is...this one has the pacing of an old man in a rocker. If you're not trying to watching holiday horror films, avoid this one...it's just not worth it. Although, I still stand by my experience of watching this film for not only series merit, but the fact that I review these type of films for this site.



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The Complete Silent Night Deadly Night

I had spent a pretty penny in November on ebay trying to get good quality versions of Silent Night Deadly Night 3, 4, and 5. Then two weeks later, guess what happened? The studios decided to release a box set to complete the 5 set of films onto dvd. That's right, you can not get the whole set on dvd, and that really ticked me off.

However, instead of sitting around and moping, I decided to go ahead with my reviews as scheduled. But before I get into the world of Silent Night Deadly Night sequels, you might want to check out my previous commentaries on the film set. Silent Night Deadly Night on dvd and part 2, as well as a second look at the iconic series.

Silent Night Deadly Night Review
Silent Night Deadly Night 2 Review
A Real Santa Claus Killer
Second Look: Silent Night Deadly Night

Stay tuned for the next three pieces of the film series, reviewed the way they should've been seen; on vhs! That's right, on vhs, so you're in for a treat...well I'm in for a treat. You'll just be bored to death, as is the norm on this site.

Don't forget to check out Silent Night Deadly Night 3-5 on dvd now in a box set.

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Holiday of Horrors 2009

This December 2009, Scary Film blog will push forward through a new list of holiday horror movies. Anything Christmas, Thanksgiving or related will be featured this month on this blog.

If you remember last year on this site, I tried to make sure to do the same thing, but had a harder time than ever. This year, I had time to prepare and even went on ebay to purchase several specific out of print vhs tapes to review for the site. If you follow along this month You’ll see all new reviews on holiday horror films.

Last year’s list was interesting, and here are the links from 2008 Holiday of horrors on scary film blog:

Silent Night Deadly Night Review
Silent Night Deadly Night 2 Review
The Search for Christmas Horror
Christmas Evil Review
Holiday Horror News
Silent Night Bloody Night Review
Santa's Slay Review
Jack Frost Review
Chopping Mall Review
A Real Santa Claus Killer

If you have suggestions, or want me to review a certain film, please let me know via a comment and I'll try to squeeze you in. We will begin the holiday of horrors 2009 December 2, 2009!

If anyone of you readers out there wants to review holiday horror movies let me know via a comment or email sirjorge AT gmail dot com with a link and I'll link you. If you want to be a guest blogger, let me know and I'll give you a slot in the order. If not, then that's all good, enjoy what is to come!

Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.

Retro Horror Double Feature Review

I had some spare time so I took a small dive into trying to watch a couple of retro horror movies from the 80's. I may have tried to dive into these films before for the site, but I don't remember doing reviews for them. I will tell you this much, once again these movies aren't going to get the royal treatment from me. They aren't worth it, they are just not worth it.

We'll Start up with Cannibal Campout.

The first thing you are going to notice about this film is the quality of the recording. The recording is really low budget, even for the 80's. I don't just mean random low budget crap, this is like handy-cam footage with very little lighting effects, or even attempts at helping the sound. There is no foley, there is just a handy-cam, most likely recorded on vhs and the actors. This is a terrible thing, trust me. The movie gets worse and worse as it progresses.

The movie is about some nasty hillbillies who prey on campers as they come to visit the camp site. That's all you need to know because the rest of the film's storyline is really convoluted to the point where I'm not really sure these guys even had a story to tell.

Then we get to why you might want to watch this movie. It's the gore. This movie has buckets of gore, serious buckets of gore. Pointless at times, but serious amounts of guts, and I do mean entrails and eating. There are people eating other people, there are gunshot wounds, there are is everything you could possibly want from this type of movie. It's a gorefest of sorts, and it's the only reason why you would even want to try to watch this movie. The movie is so graphic, so violent, that I don't even think it could be rated by the MPAA, it is just so out there.

If you really want a Cannibal Movie here you go, knock yourself out with Cannibal Campout. This is what you would probably dub as "trash core" or "gore core" because it really doesn't let up at all, once the blood starts director Jon McBride takes things to an all new level of horror that you never see anywhere else.

Here is also a trailer for the movie "Cannibal Campout" however, it's gorey so don't get offended. It's not for the weak of heart or easily offended...it's a rough gorey trailer.



If that wasn't enough for you, I decided to check out another film by Jon McBride it's called Woodchipper Massacre.



Woodchipper Massacre might as well be the sequel to Cannibal Campout. This movie sucks so bad. However, we get the trademark McBride gore. Yes, we get to see every bucket of blood, scores of deaths and just a stupid amount of gore for apparently no reason.

The story is about a family that confronts a serial killer somewhere in Connecticut. Each of the actors are terrible, they are beyond terrible. Seriously, this is the worst attempt at a movie I've seen in a long time. This movie makes Ax'Em look like an Oscar contender.

I can't even go any further with this film. I don't know what else you would want to read from me on these two films. This film, much like the first film, has a gross amount of gore, and looks like it was taped on an old vhs tape, then dubbed onto another vhs tape to make a copy then transferred from a tape deck onto a dvd-r and then copied onto a dvd for you to buy/view. I'm not sure why they made this movie other than they did something.

I credit the actors, film makers and anyone involved with these 80's trash movies, because they didn't just sit around and consume media like many of us do, they made a MOVIE! Yes, it's a terrible movie, yes it is not worth watching, but they did it! How many of us can say we made a movie? Yeah, I know I haven't. Although, I was in a backyard wrestling federation for a while.

The final verdict on these 80's trash horror movies are terrible. Woodchipper Massacre and Cannibal Campout do what other movies don't dare to do, be stupify-ingly gorey. There is just nothing else to these movies. If you're a huge fan of gore, then you're in for a great treat, because these movies are full throttle horror gore movies.

Here is a trailer for Woodchipper Massacre, once again, not for the easily offended, so watch out.



Good luck when trying to view these two films, you'll need it.

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Surviving The Game Review

I've been saying, since the inception of this site, that horror is not always blood shed and supernatural forces. True horror is sometimes found in the subtle, shortness of breath that comes from being in a situation that is life and death. However, that doesn't mean that all thrillers and mystery films are meant to be in the horror genre, but some get to a free pass on the site because there are moments of sheer horror that can not be denied. That was the case with this cult film, that has been floating around my brain since I first saw it at age 11 in 1994. I recently got this film again just to see Gary Busey's method acting in the midst of lesser known and now famous actors. Some have tried to make movies like this in the past, but many have failed to capture the sheer brutality of this film, and at the same time there are obvious flaws that can't be fast forwarded in this film, so it definitely isn't an instant winner. However, Ice-T, Rutger Hauer, Gary Busey and the dude from Scrubs make this 7 million dollar film into a piece of exploitation goodness, even if it was made in the mid 90's. So strap in your seat belts, get your helmets on, and get ready for the review of Surviving the Game.

The movie is a loose, and I do mean loose translation of the short story The Most Dangerous Game by Richard Connell. The movie right off the bat is interesting due in large part to the realism shown in the homeless world. We follow a man named Jack Mason who has lost everything. Now homeless he has to steal to live and when a meat robbery goes bad he loses his friend and his dog. Completely low, he decides to end his life, but along the way he meets with a man who offers him an interesting prospect of a second life.

The second life will allow him to get paid to survive. However, no major details are given outside of being a "hunter". Little does he know what the hunt will be. Fast forward to a cabin in the woods and we see our man Mason amidst a bunch of other hunters, all who are "feeling" him out, and one nearly starts a fight with him. This set up is fast, and while the running time is a little more than you probably expect from such a film, it still manages to go swiftly through the process, creating a good amount of story, including a special speech from Gary Busey. The speech that Busey gives is one of the major highlights of this film, and I stand by my thoughts on Busey, being under appreciated in the realms of exploitation film. Not that he did a lot of them, but I think he could pull off a few good movies, with Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez. Come on! Give Busey a second or third chance, he's psycho, he could pull it off well.

The movie then turns on a dime, Mason learns he is the hunted and he has a head start. He runs fast through thick woods in the Pacific Northwest while the hunters eat breakfast and let him get his head start. The hunters then go out on motor vehicles and hunt Mason! That's where things get bad, this film really pushes the limits of horror when Mason, a homeless man, must now fight to live, and if he makes it to civilization great...if not, he's dead.

One thing I forgot to mention is that in the start of the film, there was a point where you saw a Homeless man running in the woods getting killed by this group of hunters. That earlier shot comes to play here as Mason runs through the woods and tries to keep low profile.

How far would you go to live? That's the question you have to ask yourself as you watch Mason panic through the woods.

Another highlight in this film is when Mason runs back to the cabin, while the hunters are in the midst of the woods, and he tries to get some weapons to fight back. He stumbles upon a closet with several cases, all containing floating heads with names on them! This is when the horror feeling hits you like a brick to the temple, this is insane. You see severed heads, Mason falls to his feet, and he is completely scared when he sees an empty jar with the name "MASON" written on it. This is the last straw and he goes and finds some Gasoline and lights the cabin on fire!

Meanwhile, this is where things get really good, Gary Busey's characters finds Mason and the two have a drag out and tumble fight sequence. The two, I swear, don't seem to have stunt doubles and this fight nearly rivals "They Live" with intensity as Busey gets thrown through a door and is blown to bits as the cabin blows up due to the gasoline! This was rad, and while the movie isn't really an action film, this detail and fight made me cheer for Mason!

The music is terrible in this film. The music consists of terrible synth, and acoustic sounds alongside the traditional movie score that Symphonies probably get paid to play for. The musical ques are completely off, and really make you want to think twice about this film. You also get some terrible acting in various places by some of the hunters. The film quality is also odd here, for a 1994 film you would think that the director of photography would have chosen better shots to compile the film, instead you get really awkward edits and cuts and you have to really wonder if the people behind this film were really proud of the end product. Maybe they were going for that grindhouse, gritty, film quality, but it seems very under produced in this film, and that's pretty crappy considering how good the story is, despite the inherent flaws.

Charles S. Dutton does a wonderful job in this film. He plays the recruiter, then he plays the coach, and then he is the hunter! He really brings a lot to the role and brings a lot to the film. Rutger Hauer is genuinely creepy in this film and really made me second guess what the outcome of the film was going to be.

Is Surving The Game Scary?: Yes. This movie has some seriously scary moments. You have to really put yourself into the situation at hand to appreciate the horror in this film. This is 1994, so there's no global positioning satellite that is going to help you. There are no major cell phones that you can take to the forest of Washington State. Secondly, you are dealing with a man that has nothing to lose. Lastly, you have to consider the question that I asked earlier, how far will you go to survive?

We'll discuss the first. There are no GPS devices that can assist you here. They haven't been invented for personal use yet. Yes, there are military grade GPS systems in 1994, however the hunted is not going to think to bring such a device, considering that he is a homeless person and considering that he feels that he's getting a job here. He also doesn't really consider that notion when he's burning down the cabin and fighting Gary Busey on the porch.

Secondly, cell phones, they aren't here. My stepfather had a brick of a cellphone in the mid 90's but that thing would drop phone calls, and was terrible. It was a terrible piece of crap Motorola phone that rivaled Zack Morris' brick of a phone from Saved by the Bell. Even if Mason had a cell phone, the movie really makes you believe that these people are in the middle of nowhere and there aren't going to be any carriers that have signals out there. It just isn't the case in 1994. A scary thought.

Thirdly and really importantly, you have to consider Mason's plight here. He has lost his wife and child, he has lost his best friend and now has nothing. He's living on the streets and he has nothing left. He's a dejected man with nothing to lose and admits to suicidal notions in the beginning of this film. Had Charles S. Dutton's character not seen Mason walking by the mission, we are lead to believe that Mason would have killed himself out of hopelessness. With that in mind, you have to consider that this man has nothing left to lose, so he's going to go balls to wall in order to stay alive. He's going to even kill you, and that's when things start to lift into the horror realms and point themselves towards a more serious flim.

The horror element is injected with the simple question of "How far would you go to stay alive?". That's when you need to think about yourself. Put yourself in this situation, if you were tricked into taking a new job and they were hunting you, would you kill? If not, would you hide? Would you roll over and die? Think about this, and then enjoy this popcorn thriller of a film.

The end of the film really breaks down and turns into a revenge film, but not without a few twists. However, this film drops you off in Seattle, Wa with nothing more. It's interesting to note that there is a sense of ownership that you feel about this film at the credits because it doesn't really answer your final question. What happens next? You won't get that answered at all, and I haven't felt upset about an ending since I read the book "Vision Quest" in high school. Surviving The Game is available on dvd and it's really cool. It's an interesting action, thriller and in my view horror. There is a horror element to this movie that you can't deny, even if that wasn't the intention of the directors and writers...or was it? You decide.



Looking for grindhouse, horror, or sci-fi films? Please check out our amazon astore featuring all things horror. Don't trust astore? Check out amazon.com, surprisingly they have more grindhouse,horror,and rare sci-fi than you may not have thought possible.