Friday, May 18, 2012

Return To Horror High or Return of Bad Slasher Comedy

In the late 1980’s a lot of horror movies were being rushed into production because of the box office success of many of the early slasher films that were getting much publicity. Much like action movies of the era, the studios wanted to continually pump out horror style options in between major studio productions in the genre so that teens were continually fed a slew of horror. The problem was that these films were terrible, and mostly rendered little to no box office success. Then the internet came out in the 90’s and more people started their quest to watch these older movies. Such is the case for Return To Horror High.

I first saw this film as a child, and it was ok. There are a lot of inside jokes, self-aware jokes, and lots of sexual humor that I didn’t get the first time I saw it. It took me a few years before I realized that there was a lot of cliché in this film. The characters are all either parodies of 1980s high school cinema or horror cliché. Either way, the characters are forgettable, laughable, and just tired.

The movie centers around a killer that is targeting people at a small high school, where there just happens to be a movie being filmed at the same time, years before Scream ever did the same. As the production continues, the real body count mirrors the one being filmed. The story continues and while there are a few boring sequences, some gratuitous nude scenarios, and lots of blood, the film falls flat, and is kind of boring.

Die-hard fans of horror comedy as well as George Clooney junkies will appreciate this one. Even though Clooney is not a prominent part of the film, there is still an aura about it, that makes you keep watching until the end. This is a great example of how the genre can be done terribly, as it is not a great film in any sense of the word. There are so many bad points, that you’ll just want to go back to sleep. I know I did.

I do not recommend Return To Horror High unless you’re purchasing a massive collection of horror movies, or you’re an absolute fanatic about George Clooney. To be fair, there are a few moments where you break the fourth wall and you see how a film is made. You also get a lot of “rhetoric” and jabs at the time period. You’ll have to really pay attention to get it, because it’s mixed up in sleeze.


  1. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 18, 2012 at 2:40 PM

    I want to bugger Maureen McCor-chick (as the bird was in 1974 when the bird was 18, not as the bird is now obviously). By the way, i had to change the last syllable of her surname to make it sound more feminine, my homo-phobia is quite murderous sometimes ! ! !.

  2. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 18, 2012 at 2:45 PM

    George Clooney is a pile of dog-shit.

  3. Corky PerceptionMay 18, 2012 at 2:59 PM

    Hey Hamster, at least Clooney is rampagingly heterosexual, you must be approving of that ! ?.

  4. jervaise brooke hamsterMay 18, 2012 at 3:04 PM

    Yeah, admittedly that is a major redeeming quality obviously, its just that in every other regard (especially his film-making and acting skills etc) i think hes a bloody load of old garbage.

  5. Aw, we only saw one pair of boobies for a sec, it was the highlight of this movie. A real train wreck this one.


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A writer first, cat lover second, and some other stuff too. Human, with lots of faults, and terrible communication.
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