Dee Snider's Strangeland Review

Dee Snider’s Strangeland is not that bad, but only after putting it into proper context and a few drinks. Strangeland came out in 1998, I was 15 years old, and hated anything hair metal. Therefore, I didn’t see this film, on the bases of hating the band Twisted Sister, and so many other incarnations of hair metal.

But times change, and while I’m still not a fan of the 80’s metal scene, I am a fan of horror films and had to pick this one up to review.

First and foremost, Dee Snider wrote this one, so I was not expecting anything worthwhile or even shocking. However, this movie does go into a deeper level of thinking if you take the time to consider the movies main premise.

The story revolves around a guy who lures teenagers via a chat room to parties, where they end being tortured and made part of strange piercing rituals. After Dee’s character, Captain Howdy, lures a detectives daughter he is thrown into an asylum, only to emerge a changed man. While he shows signs of change, the town’s people do not like it, and they end up lynching Howdy in a very public scenario led by none other than Robert Englund. Howdy survives, and comes back to haunt everyone who was involved.


This movie sounds a lot like Friday the 13th right? I mean it seems similar, but the main character is the guy from Twisted Sister! I couldn’t get passed that, and although he looks very creepy, I don’t know if I can separate the persona of metal mayhem and an evil doer. This film is hard to watch at times, but if you stick with it, it does have a clear message about the current state of trust and the internet. This film was probably more poignant in 1998, considering that chat rooms were huge, and not so popular now.

The movie is relatively short, and has a few gorey situations, but overall it’s not as good as I thought it would be. Honestly, it’s not as good as Bon Jovi’s Vampire flick, but it is not as horrible as some of the straight to dvd films that I’ve seen in my long adventure into horror film review.

Dee Snider’s Strangeland is worth checking out once, just to say that you’ve seen it, but I don’t really recommend this one to everyone. Most people will end up hating me, and the movie as a whole.

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Vampires: Los Muertos Review

Vampires: Los Muertos has only a few things going for it, and that’s not a good thing. The overall look and feel of the film is surprising to me. For a straight to dvd effort, the film quality if actually not half bad. But before we elaborate on that, let us consider the premise of this film:

The location is the same as the first film, Mexico. But long gone is James Woods, and here comes someone completely new, a vampire hunter named Derek Bliss, played by none other than Jon Bon Jovi. That right there should be enough to tell you to stay away, but not me, I’m an idiot and I like punishing my brain sometimes. (legally of course) The hunter goes through the streets of Mexico collecting bounties and going on his merry way. He then hears about a high profile case and starts to unravel a big plot. There is a syndicate of vampires run by a princess vampire and they are in search of the Black Cross. This cross will help aid the vampires in a ritual that will make them able to walk in the daylight. But before they can get their hands on this, they have to deal with Derek, his new pal Sancho, and some allies in the fight to stop this from taking place.

For a vampire film, there is very little gore involved. There are a few splatters here and there, but nothing really worth mentioning. There are some jump scenes, but overall this film is moderately paced, and even slow at times. You can feel as though the director knows that the networks are going to splice the movie into pieces and insert commercials, so there are a lot of key moments that seem to end out of nowhere, as if the commercials were going to arrive to fill the gaps.



The second thing that this has going for it, besides Bon Jovi’s lead role, is Diego Luna. Diego Luna somehow shows up in this film to play a 14 year old who wants to join Derek in his quest to fight vampires. Diego Luna is a great actor, and I loved him in a lot of different roles, but here, he just seems out of place.

Check out the trailer for Vampires: Los Muertos:


This movie wasn’t complete garbage. Bon Jovi has some above average acting skills, and he seems to be doing what he can with the role, and you know what? I kind of dig it. Sure it’s not the greatest vampire movie ever made, in fact it’s not even as good as the horrible first film with James Woods, but it has a certain level of Sci-Fi Channel charm that makes me enjoy it.

I’m not going to say that this is the greatest vampire film ever, but Vampires: Los Muertos is worth at least a once over, and to many Bon Jovi fans, a twice or thrice over.

Other Vampire Films:

John Carpenter's Vampires via Amazon.com
Dracula 2000 via Amazon.com
Blacula via Amazon.com
The Lost Boys via Amazon.com

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High Tension Review

High Tension is a balls to the wall horror film. This movie is insane on a lot of levels, and offers some great overall acting, scenarios, and horror. I don't fully understand some of the scenes in this film, and the twist ending isn't my favorite, but as a stand alone film, it is a knock out. I highly enjoyed High Tension on a lot of levels.



The plot revolves around a fat, creepy, dude. He is shown masturbating with a severed head, and that is the sickest introduction I've ever seen in a film. He then proceeds to murder a whole family, except for two young women. He takes one hostage and is unaware of the second, and as he puts one in his van tied up, the other one jumps in and hopes for a stop so that she can save her friend and bring justice.



We get to see this young lady in a lot of different scenarios. From her friendly introduction, driving to a new locale, to her more personal bedroom situation. She seems to be the main hero in the movie, and you really start to rally behind her as she goes through the slaughter, then tries to help her friend through various situations. High Tension was directed by Alexandre Aja, who went on to direct P2 and other films.

A specific stop is at a gas station, where she gets really close to calling the authorities before the clerk gets an axe to the chest. This prompts a really cool car chase scene with one of my favorite cars ever! You'll have to see the film to see this hot rod.



Just when you think you've got it all figured out, there is a big wrench thrown at you , and leaves you questioning the direction of this film. Some might be completely turned off by the "twist" of sorts, but others are ok with it, as it closes the film swiftly.

But before we talk about that, here is a trailer for the film High Tension:




What develops into a slasher film, really becomes an identity crisis film, and I know upon first viewing, I was definitely upset. However, after repeated watchings, I learned to enjoy this visual masterpiece and really loved seeing the development of what seems to be a one sided lover story.

Although, I felt that the duality scenario was just an easy way out for what was developing into a serious slasher franchise. It really relies on your willingness to just let logic go straight out the window, because if you're not that type of viewer, you're going to break your television with anger. The downfall of the whole film relies on the fact that the main character is the killer but not as you see him...or should I say her?

This film is a nice gorey thrill ride, and while I appreciated the effort, it just was one ending short of a full package. I liked it though, it was fun to watch, and really well edited, and cleverly shot. The musical choice of Muse also scored it some points too. Overall, not a bad import, and dubbed in an ok fashion. I recommend High Tension to anyone, but just warn you about the frivolous ending.

On a quick note, apparently the plot of this film is really close to the book by Dean Koontz entitled, "Intensity". I can not really confirm the similarities, as I haven't read the book, but maybe you want to look into that.

Other Foreign Film Recommendations:

Cache via Amazon.com
Irreversible via Amazon.com
Audition via Amazon.com
Three Extremes via Amazon.com

Also, check out "Intensity" by Dean Koontz via Amazon.com

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Blood: The Last Vampire Review

Blood the Last Vampire is an interesting anime horror film, but doesn’t really feel complete. The movie is only about 50 minutes long, but packs one heck of a punch, all things considered.

The story revolves around a school girl near an Army Base who’s sole job is to kill vampires, whom have taken human form. She uses a samurai sword to cut them in half, and then walk away. There is little talking involved, and little backstory, until the last moments when this film reveals a little more of the main character than you can assume.

Here is a trailer for Blood the Last Vampire:


The visual style is very good. It almost looks like a live action film, rather than an animated feature. The story is no nonsense, and full of action. You don’t get any major character development, and in its place you get a ton of blood splatters, gore, and freak out scenes.

If you’re not used to Japanese Animation, this film will catch you off guard. You don’t really see a lot of animated films in the United States with nearly as much gore. This film has a lot of blood, and it is unapologetic about it.

If you could make Blade into 50 minutes, you get this film.

I recommend it if you like Vampires, horror films, and anime. Otherwise, just skip out on Blood the Last Vampire.

Other Vampire Classics:

The Horror of Dracula via Amazon.com
Bram Stoker’s Dracula via Amazon.com
Dracula via Amazon.com
John Carpenter’s Vampires via Amazon.com
The Hunger via Amazon.com
Fright Night via Amazon.com

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The Relic Review

The Relic is a slow moving horror film, with a lot of great ideas but little activity for the over stimulated culture we live in currently.

The movie is about a Museum researcher who returns from South America with all sorts of crap he finds. At face value, the findings seem scarce and the owner of the Museum is skeptical of what has really been found. Meanwhile, dead bodies are discovered on board of the ship that brought the crates over to the U.S. That would be weird, but then people start dropping off in the Museum and things start to take a horrific turn. It turns out to be a large monster that is now loose and its time to mop up.

First thing I thought about is how boring the execution of this film really is. I really had a hard time getting into the development of the overall characters a midst the ever growing horror that was being unleashed by this monster. It’s a cgi/effects monster and you can tell that the technology was fairly new at the time, because it’s really choppy and lackluster around the edges.

The movie progresses really slow to me. It’s hard to watch, and just like going to a real museum, this film has a lot of shots where the camera seems to be on a track and slowly moves through the museum to show off the interiors.




I would liken the monster to a warewolf of sorts, or some sort of wild animal on four legs, but I could be wrong.

At one point, I swear there is a dream sequence, or it could have been myself. There is a significant twist at the end, which forces you to hate the writers of this film.

I admit that this movie did have a lot of creepy points, and if you’re easily scared when the lights are out, and are creeped out by closed spaces, museums, and creepy, dusty, crates, you’re going to love this one.

There are a few moments of gore in this film, and it's interesting that this was a major release film, because usually it gets toned down.

I was more scared and entertained by R.L Stine novels then the Relic.

I thought The Relic was boring, slow, and uninspired. I didn’t read the novel that The Relic was based on, so maybe if I venture into the book by Lincoln Child and Douglas Preston.

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The Wizard of Gore Review

The Wizard of Gore is a gorey piece of horror history, but really isn't all that great when you think about it. The movie follows a magician who is digging up bodies from the cemetery, brings them to life, then kills them live on stage, only to bring them back for the audience to see.

Within an hour, those same women are found dead.

Police are baffled, and one television show host wants to get to the bottom of things.



First of all, this magician looks like a 70's era porno star. He reminds me a lot of John Holmes or someone that would be in Debbie Does Dallas or some other film. I'm surprised Ron Jeremy wasn't featured in the back drop of this film, because the main villain looks like a porno star. I mean look at him...just look!



So with that in mind, I thought for sure I would see some nudity. That was thwarted fast. There is some slight cleavage on the part of the talk show host, but her "love" scenes are the most vapid and unsexy scenes I've ever seen. It is like the director wanted to tease you, but then decided not to after all. The sexual situations are so horrible, that it made me want to throw something at the television. The girls that this guy is digging up look perfect. There is no sign of decay, no sign of death, and you would believe that things are on the up and up.



The majority of talk of this film is not so much on the plot, but the gore. The blood is bright read, there are hot dogs and sausages looking like intestines, and while the magician (wizard) is messing around with killing these girls live on stage, the screams are just horrible. It's almost like they dubbed the screaming after the fact, and just went with whatever sounds they could get.

This film is so hard to watch that you might get lost as to what is going on. The story doesn't do a good job explaining itself, and right when you finally figure things out, the story throws a wrench at you. The story ends on such a stupid twist, and such a cop out, that you're seriously going to be upset.

Here is a trailer for The Wizard of Gore:


The Wizard of Gore might be a cult classic, but it is really hard to watch. Granted, this film was made in the 70's so my expectation levels were lowered, but this low? It wasn't all that great, seriously, it is gorey but there is such a horrible sense of acting in this film. It's either really understated, or really over the top. The gore, that's where this film shines. There's a lot of cool gore effects, considering the age of this film, and I liked that. Other than that though, The Wizard of Gore just isn't worth the time. I'm sorry.

Maybe I need a second viewing of this one. I don't know if I can make it though. It's worth watching at least once, and it's definitely getting a good push into the mainstream with the recommendation that was made in the film Juno. Herschell Gordon Lewis really does a nice job creating the splatter film genre, but this was a tough watch if you're not a fan of gore. If you are a fan of gore, you'll LOVE The Wizard of Gore, I mean it even has the word GORE in the title!

They remade this film recently with Crispin Glover as the main Wizard, so maybe the updated version might be an improvement. I'll make sure to check it out for a future review.

More Herschell Gordon Lewis films:

Blood Feast via Amazon.com
Two Thousand Maniacs via Amazon.com
She Devils on Wheels via Amazon.com
The Gore-Gore Girls via Amazon.com
Color Me Blood Red via Amazon.com
Blood Feast 2 All You Can Eat via Amazon.com

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The Top 10 Bodily Explosions

Horror movies are known for a lot of gore at times. I for one enjoy a good gore scene, however some are better than others. Recently, Fearnet.com, posted a list of the best bodily explosions ever recorded onto film. Some are from horror films, some are from general release films, but one thing is for sure, bodily explosions are a staple in horror cinema.
Here’s their top 10 list, with links on where to purchase them, and finally, a link to where you can see some gruesome photos as proof.

10. Terror Firmer


9. Chopping Mall


8. Sleepaway Camp 3: Teenage Wasteland


7. Planet Terrror


6. Total Recall


5. War of the Worlds


4. Raiders of the Lost Ark


3. Cloverfield


2. Scanners


1. Dawn of the Dead
Obviously these films have some major gore in them, however, there are definitely other films that I would mention on the list. I think that there is a TON of films that have exploding body parts, heads, and body functions that aren't exactly easy to watch sometimes Fearnet.com has some photos from these films, if you're interested, otherwise I would suggest purchasing these and finding out what the hype is all about.

I wanted to post my own top 10, but honestly, I drew a blank when it comes to body explosions. I could name a few, but I'll save that for another place and another time.