Monday, February 27, 2012

Dollman vs Demonic Toys Review

You see a lot of straight to vhs film displayed in the old school video stores that line up our memories, but today? Good luck. I live in a town with no video store, so finding these rare gems like I did when I was a kid means utilizing every ounce of my brain to remember what I saw on the shelves and basic cable television when I was a kid. Most of these B-movies get translated into Spanish and are played between soccer games. I finally broke down and sat through this one, in English this time, and it’s not exactly an instant classic. The movie we will talk about today is none other than Dollman vs Demonic Toys.

This film went straight to dvd and features a lot of flashbacks. One of my personal pet peeves in film is the constant draw of flashbacks to tell stories. This film tells a story of Brick Bardo, who is Dollman as he goes to a new town with a shrunken nurse, and tries to make things right for her, and a rogue cop that has uncovered a secret lab where demonic toys are being built and used to kill!

The main purpose of the film is for Dollman to face off against the demonic toys because there is a demon soul that wants to have sex with our shrunken nurse! I kid you not. This film has a lot of deliberately stupid moments, including several flashbacks with nothing more than Dollman blowing things up. At one point he blows up can only be noted as a rapist van with the words “FAGS” written on the side of it.

You most likely know how this one turns out, and well, you will find that the movie only plays for about an hour before it just finishes itself off. The movie feels as though this film was commissioned by the old Science Fiction channel, now known as syfy, the way some of the cuts are presented, some of which just yearn for a commercial interruption, and well, maybe that’s why it is formatted in the way that it is.

The music is spooky, and eerie, not too unlike what you’d find from a Goosebumps made for television film. The music is actually a surprise, and feels odd to me.

Tim Thomerson reminds me of Rugged Ronny Garvin in a way, but other than his crew cut and weakness for a hot nurse, he’s a character that doesn’t do a whole lot for me in this film, compared to the original Dollman. Phil Fondacaro plays a cop protecting the toys at one point, and at first I thought he was the dwarf from Seinfeld, but upon closer inspection realized that he wasn’t at all, much to my dismay.

The movie is short, the characters are vapid, and if you haven’t seen the rest of the demonic toys or dollman series, you won’t really care for this one. It really feels like a made for tv movie from the 1990’s more than it feels like a release that would go straight to dvd in these modern times. The poster art is cool, and some of the musical cues are worth checking out, but overall, this is a laughable movie. The fight sequencing in the end with an oversized Guile toy is just too much, just check it out to see what I mean. Dollman vs Demonic Toys is not a highly recommended film, unless you’re watching all the series in one sitting, as there is a box set out now.

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A writer first, cat lover second, and some other stuff too. Human, with lots of faults, and terrible communication.
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