Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Top 5 Over Rated Horror Genres

ca
Horror movies can be amazing, they can be fun, and they are the basis for this blog and has been for four years running. Despite the fact that I’ve written 600 plus articles, I get no respect and I can’t join the damn Tana drinkers…or even get screeners from major companies like some other less knowledgeable blogs that seem to catch all the breaks. For today’s post, I wanted to look at 5 of the most over rated genres in horror, and after much consideration, I have narrowed them down to a specific few that are just tiresome. You might agree, you might disagree, I don’t really care.

5. Vampires – I am absolutely sick of Vampires, and the whole genre. It has been done to death. It’s been the subject of comedy, horror, gore, sex, and so much more, and guess what? 99.99% of Vampire movies suck and I can’t stand them. Sure, there are a few exceptions, but most often than not, you’ve already seen everything there is to see about the genre. Rocko’s Modern Life had it right, Dracula has been done to death and all iterations have been done to absolute oblivion. Despite the fact that HBO and other companies are banking their lives on this genre, I feel that it’s far overdue to be labeled over rated.

4. Zombies – I’m sick of zombies, and you are too. Admit it! Some might be quick to say that they aren’t, but how many times can you see the living get feasted on by the undead. There have been so many movies and sub-movies and remakes on the genre that it has been completely diluted to a terrible waste of my time. Even though I like the latest and greatest from the genre, it’s over rated, and should not be so popular these days. It really is a tired and boring genre at this point, I’m sorry.

3. British Horror – One of the slowest journeys you’re ever going to take in regards to horror fandom is that of the British horror genre. Sure, they have some movies that people swear by, but for the most part, the British like to keep things moving as slow as my last bowel movement. It’s painful, it’s bloody, and it features some of the worst dental work in the industry ever. The few bright spots are outdone by the constant barrage of terrible ideas come to life.

2. Identity Crisis – I hate this tool for plot points. I hate when a character doesn’t know who they are, or is revealed to be dreaming, or is a villain but has manifested themselves into a different stage of mind. I can’t stand when this cop out happens, and it seems to happen all the time with what some call “classics”. If I see this again in film I’m going to smash my head into my computer.

1. Cabins in the Woods – I am sick and tired of having to read, watch, and listen to the cabin that is in the woods some where far away. Camp horror, cabins, isolated places, and so much more seems to be the basis of some of the worst and most over rated movies. Even the latest film that everyone is talking about has a damn cabin in the middle of the woods…or does it? This tired genre is going to get relit every few years and as I type this they are filming a new Sleepaway Camp movie, so there, it’s not so farfetched to be number one on my list.

There you have it folks, the 5 most over rated genres in horror. I’m going to get back to sleep or whatever it is I do when I’m not writing bad reviews for this website.

2 comments:

rip sterling said...

Yes completely agree with some of these genres or plot tools. Once in a while there's a film that relights the genre and off we go again. And the vamp genre, they can put these fuckers back in their caskets for the next decade. The zombie genre seems to be thawing except for the Walking Dead series (big fan of the comics, haven't seen the series yet).

jervaise brooke hamster said...

Sir Jorge, well done for including British horror on this list, hopefully that'll help to educate a few more people about what a ludicrous and pathetic joke British horror films (and British films in general) really are.